Happy Father’s Day, Dad — You’re An Inspiration. ❤
You know the sepia photo filter? Well, that’s how my dad, Andrew, sees the world. He was born colorblind… yet never, ever let it be a handicap in his 80+ years and still going strong.
Dad sees the world as black and white, with shades of browns and grays — that’s it. He can usually distinguish between bold colors, but not all the myriad shades. As I studied the beauty of these vibrant flowers in my garden, I thought of my dad and how his eyes see the world.
By contrast, this is how dad has seen colors all his life:
Color blindness never held him back
Dad was born in Edinburgh, Scotland in 1936. He chose baking as his profession. At 17 years old in baking school, he says he had a special friend that would help him with the food coloring for the cake frosting, and he was able to pass all his exams no problem.
Dad’s always been a bit of an eccentric! He never cared what people thought of him. He happily wears odd socks, and mis-matching pants and shirts. Of course, for my four sisters and me, this was a source of embarrassment growing up. Lol. Dad could be pretty outspoken, too.
However, with all my dad has accomplished, he is a tremendous source of inspiration to me.
Emigrating from Scotland to Canada
At age 21 he left Scotland on a 50cc moped with £50 in his pocket and headed for Canada on a ship, with a strong will to make a whole new life for himself. (History repeated itself when I emigrated myself from Scotland to San Diego in 1999, with a mere £50 in my pocket… and a strong knowing that a whole new life was waiting for me).
A few years after Dad arrived in Ontario, he met my mum (who had emigrated to Canada from Scotland many years earlier with her family; her own father had set out to make a better life).
Humble beginnings…
My folks had four daughters and adopted a fifth. We were raised in a small Quaker community in rural B.C. called Argenta, where my dad was the local baker. He also built two houses (entirely self-taught for all that was needed). One was a small log cabin and the other a larger, Tudor style house with arched windows, which was featured in a book on DIY house building.
As a child, I didn’t really appreciate my environment nor circumstances. I always felt that the kids in school had much more than my family: better clothes, trendier hairstyles, fancier homes, enviable vacations… But as the years have gone by, I’m able to look back on my upbringing as an adult with tremendous gratitude for how unique and special it was.
And, I’ve learned the lesson of how important it is that we don’t compare ourselves to others. As the late great Dr. Wayne Dyer would say:
We cannot strive to be ‘better than others’ but we can certainly strive to be a ‘better version of ourselves,’ and that is a lifelong process! Something my dad would certainly agree with.
PHOTO montage from top left:
● Circa 1967: dad with my big sister Moira and me
● Dad in his 20’s sporting his blazer with the Kinnaird family crest that he was super proud of
● Painting of dad age 30 by his artist friend Robert (Bob) Pow in Canada
● Dad and me, taken in Scotland in 2009
For the love of children
Dad absolutely loves children. When he was 9 years old, he told his parents that he wanted to open an orphanage when he grew up! He devoted much of his life to rearing his own kids and helping other families. In the late 1970’s, my parents divorced and they agreed that Dad would receive custody of all five girls and move us back to his original homeland in Edinburgh, Scotland. (We sailed across the Atlantic Ocean on a big, old Polish ship; it took us nine days!)
Always resourceful
I really don’t know how Dad managed by himself in Scotland with us daughters. Five girls, age 3–13 and he barely ever had much money. Somehow, he always found a way to be resourceful — at times working in a bakery at dawn and coming home at breakfast time to make sure we all got off to school. And later, by taking in foster children so he could be a stay-at-home parent for all of us. Phew, it was a large family and extremely challenging. But, we’ve all fared well!
By the way, we had a black and white television for many years at first. The TV license was cheaper! Eventually, us girls rallied and persuaded dad to upgrade to the color license and he did say he could notice a difference.
Endless creativity
Dad is also very artistic, creative and musical. He wrote a ton of music and poetry — many in Gaelic; had a spiritual book published in the 1970's; painted and drew many beautiful pieces, and especially loved drawing Disney characters; he spoke multiple languages, and played several instruments — he still played the mandolin and keyboard daily up until recently. Somehow, dad even found time to attend the Open University to further his studies in psychology and got a couple degrees.
He always encouraged us girls to reach for the stars. He told us we could be anything we wanted to be.
Anytime I’m feeling just a bit overwhelmed with my overflowing plate of commitments, and my busy life running my own business, I remind myself how incredibly accomplished my father has been throughout his life.
Precious moments
My dad is 80 now and moved into a senior care home in Dunfermline, Scotland early last year — thanks to tremendous help from sister Fiona. Over several years, my dad began to develop Alzheimer’s disease and dementia, and it made sense to our family to move him out of his own home into care facilities so he could receive proper help.
His mind struggles to make sense of most things and have proper conversations, and he works best with solid routines at the care home. I’ve found that he often responds best to the written word and we keep a little whiteboard in his room for that purpose. (I so miss being able to pick up the phone and hear dad’s voice. Or send him a newsy email and hear back from him promptly with an equally newsy update. He was always such a good writer.)
As dad’s health has shifted, I’ve slowly come to accept the fact that the father I knew even just five years ago is gone and I just relate to how he shows up in the moment.
I just loved this special moment below that I captured with dad during a visit in May 2016; he suddenly recognizes himself on my iPhone as I was recording the video.
I shared this clip in the comments of my Father’s Day tribute on Facebook last year; the responses by many of my dear community members truly warmed my heart. (Medium won’t let me embed just the comment… I’ve inserted a screenshot below and here’s the link to the comment to read the beautiful sharing from others.)
Dad is a fascinating man, with a brilliant mind, highly creative and incredibly accomplished. I have immense admiration for my father.
Thank you Dad for everything — all your tremendous hard work, your devotion to your family, the hardship, the sacrifices, the guidance and your unconditional love. And most of all, for believing in me. I love you.
Family Visits — Scotland
I go to Scotland to visit family as often as I can, usually once a year or so but last year was super special as I had three trips to the UK! (Two of my sisters — Fiona and Grace, live in Scotland, along with my niece and three nephews. My older sister lives in Ontario and our adopted sister lives on Vancouver Island with her two daughters and five grandchildren!)
Last fall, my big sis Moira and I timed a visit to Scotland together and enjoyed an amazing reunion with our two younger sisters over there. It had been 15 years since the four of us were together. We rented a castle and had a professional photoshoot done. Such great memories!
Family Visits — Vancouver Island
When I was two, my parents adopted Catriona (Trina), an eighteen-month-old First Nations baby from Vancouver Island. My father was also very devoted to her care and upbringing; as a young adult himself, he always wanted to adopt/foster children.
Trina emigrated to Scotland with dad and us girls in the late 1970's… and then chose to return to her family of origin and settle on Vancouver Island in the mid-1990’s. She’s very happy with her two grown daughters and five grandchildren. I’ve made a couple visits over the past few years and always marvel at the precious spirits of these cute kids!
Father And Daughter — Paul Simon
I found this special song on YouTube — my dad loved listening to Simon and Garfunkel songs and I know he would love this one!
As dad was so devoted to his five daughters, six grandchildren and five great grandchildren + extended family — I know he’d love the lyrics of this song. Dad always told us to reach for the stars!
I’m gonna watch you shine
Gonna watch you grow
Gonna paint a sign
So you always know
As long as one and one is two
Ooh ooh
There could never be a father
Love his daughters more than I love you
(hehe.. I added the plural to daughters in that last line). 😍
I Love My Daddy — a song for the inner child in all of us!
I’m including this precious Father’s Day song for preschool and kindergarten kids, just because! Dad would’ve loved this sweet children’s song!
Happy Father’s Day To All!
Whether your own father is alive or has made his transition… whether you are/were on good terms with your dad or otherwise… and whether you are a father yourself or not, let me take this lovely annual opportunity to wish you a very special day, celebrating fathers around the world. ❤︎
Updates added, Father’s Day 2022
P.S. My dear daddio Andy made his transition on to his next journey in the heavenly realms on February 21st, 2020 — right before the global pandemic and all the lockdowns hit. It was divine timing. Although I didn’t get to be by his side when he took his final breath, I held vigil at home with a special altar for his last 48 hours and played his favorite classical music before my flight to Scotland. I kept saying, “Daddy, I’m coming to see you, I’m coming to see you. But don’t wait for me! If you’re ready to go, it’s okay — you can go.” Aww. He passed the morning of my flight. I’m so grateful I got to be with my family for a few days, and that we were able to gently lay our father to rest in the very special and tranquil Binning Wood. I miss dad dearly, but he is forever in my heart and we commune daily often many times a day. I have the special painting of dad sitting on a chair in my home office and he keeps me company and often gives me advice! I feel blessed and honored to have him as a spirit friend now. 😇🙏🏻
Here’s a special tribute video I made in honor of dad on what would’ve been his 84th birthday on November 4th, 2020:
P.P.S. If you have a loved one on the ‘other side’ I cannot recommend highly enough the services of gifted, renowned medium Hollister Rand. I had an amazing sitting with her earlier this year (2022) and sure enough dad was right there — it was incredibly comforting to receive his messages. (Along with a most fun and surprise visit from my maternal grandmother!).
