It’s just very difficult not to default to literally ‘black’ and ‘white’ thinking when you are on the receiving end of (sometimes scary or life-threatening) racism.
Hi Mark, thanks for reading and writing.
Kindra F.

Kindra, thanks for the thoughtful response. I grew up in the deep south, and this is part of the thinking on the 'giving' end as well. I sometimes fight what I grew up with, mostly from other families because my mom wouldn’t have it. I do see whites determine acceptance. Basically, as I described it. European is what I came up with as well. White in many contexts excludes everything else. I caught myself asking why we always need to put people in a box with a label. First, it was why do I need to determine if someone is black, and then, what does white mean? It’s not expecting to be color blind, as obviously we’re not, but more acknowledging ethnicity rather than our warped idea of race.

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