Finding 8 Essential Life Companions:
2 Humans, 3 Hobbits, a Dwarf, an Elf, and a Wizard.
J.R.R. Tolkien’s five races in The Fellowship of the Ring — humans, hobbits, dwarves, elves, and wizards —represent what I think he considered to be prototypes of the essential companions needed for our road trip through life:
- Gandalf: The Caller.
“I will help you bear this burden, Frodo, as long as it is yours to bear.”
A Christ-type figure throughout The Lord of the Rings, Gandalf it is who first “calls” and “sends” Frodo on this pilgrimage; he is the one who realizes that only Frodo can carry this ring without becoming corrupted by it. And yet he patiently waits until Frodo comes to realize this too:
Frodo: I wish the ring had never come to me. I wish none of this had happened.
Gandalf: So do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.
For Tolkien, a meaningful life will ask us to willingly bear at least one burden. I asked a friend of mine recently, how his marriage was doing. I knew it was a burden for him. “This marriage is my calling” he simply said, with deep conviction. Nothing more needed to be said.
2. Aragorn: The Mentor
“All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost. — Aragorn’s Riddle.
This riddle describes Aragorn well: a Mentor disguised as a “lost” wanderer.You must find a Mentor, if you don’t have one. .But don’t choose the most successful person you can find, for “all that is gold does not glitter.”
3. Legolas: The Ancient One
“The stars are veiled. Something stirs in the East.”
Legolas, as an elf, has existed for many, many long centuries. He is timeless; he is ancient. He is from another world and another time, and travels through this one almost like a stranger. His wisdom is not of this time or this world. To travel well, and wisely, you too, need to find an Ancient One; a travel companion from another time period, and suck all the wisdom you can from them.
You are not limited to travel companions of the 21st century. You can choose someone from the 14th or 15th century. Find such a companion, and get to know them intimately. I have found such a companion. His name is Thomas A Kempis. He is French monk from 14th century France. And the wisdom and perspective I have gained from him I have never found in a living person.
4. Gimli: The Foreigner
“I need no map,” said Gimli…gazing out before him with a strange light in his deep eyes. “… we have wrought the image of those mountains into many works of metal and of stone, and into many songs and tales. They stand tall in our dreams: Baraz, Zirak, Shathur.”
Find a foreigner for one of your travelling companions. Someone whose perspective on life is perhaps foreign to yours. Someone who recognizes truth in places you cannot. Someone who sees things in yourself than you, perhaps, are blind to. Someone who is willing to move boldly into your life, and confront you, even strike you in love, if needed. (Let a friend strike me, rather than an enemy kiss me — -says the Hebrew Proverbs).
5+6. Merry and Pippin: The Whimsical
“We are horribly afraid, but we are coming with you!”
Merry and Pippin had the gift of being able to squeeze enjoyment out of life in even the bleakest of circumstances. Gandalf said of them:
“These hobbits will sit on the edge of ruin and discuss the pleasures of the table, or the small doings of their fathers, grandfathers, and great grandfathers, and their remotest cousins to the 9th degree, if you encourage them with undue patience”
You need travelling buddies who will give you perspective on life; who will make you laugh at yourself. As an undergraduate, God gave me a small group of such buddies. With one, I would sneak up onto the roof-tops of my college in the small hours of the morning, and smoke pipes, and sing hymns, and discuss the meaning of meaning. With another, a crazy Ugandan, I would mosey around town on my small 50 cc motorbike, exploring the canyons and off-roads on the edge of LA. These guys would feed me at some primal level it is hard to explain.
7. Samwise Gamgee: The Soulmate.
“I may not be able to carry the ring for you, Mr. Frodo, but I can carry you with it!”
Sam uttered these words to Frodo at the depth of his despair. Of the entire fellowship, Sam was the only one who was able to be with Frodo as his will finally collapsed on the terrible slopes of Mt. Doom, just a short distance from the end. Unable to lift the horrifying ring off of Frodo’s neck — -who alone had been commissioned to carry it — -he offered to carry Frodo himself. And mustering the last of his strength, he hauled the limp Frodo onto his back, and staggered up the last remaining steps of Mt. Doom.
It took me 30 years to find my soul mate — -someone who would stay with me for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer. The greatest road trip of my life really is the journey of learning to really and deeply love my wife.
8. Boromir: The Traitor.
“Frodo looked up. His heart went suddenly cold. He caught the strange gleam in Boromir’s eyes, yet his face was still kind and friendly.”
You will be betrayed by someone along the way. Probably not maliciously or cruelly, but because you have been misunderstood, or because someone has lost faith in you, and your pilgrimage.
Boromir lost his faith in Frodo, as the anointed ring-bearer. Such power, he thought, should not remain in the hands of a feeble hobbit. It must be used — -by himself he decided — — to destroy the enemies of the human race.
We are fallen. We will all betray someone’s trust in us. And we will ourselves feel betrayed by at least one person along this road-trip. Be ready for it. Don’t be too shocked. Just because one other loses faith in you does not mean you must lose faith in yourself, in the journey you have been Called to undertake.
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