It Is Okay To Make Judgments
There I said it. It is okay to make judgments out of anything. Well, before I get dissed and thrown by virtual tomatoes, then let me ask you, is it possible not to make judgments out of anything? Really? I can even look at a tomato and say that, “ooh it must taste bad because it looks like a horizontal feces”. I dare you, I double dare you to not make any judgment out of anything that moves. I’m pretty sure you won’t be able to do that.
You see, the problem with the word “judge”, is that the meaning of the word has been degraded throughout times. Nowadays, forming any kind of opinion will be called as “judging”. It’s just natural for humans to form an opinion in their heads when they see something. It runs automatically; seeing something, comparing it to the knowledge you have in your brain, and then form an opinion out of it. It’s inevitable. It’s okay to see the truck driver yelling and think, “he must be a grumpy sod”, or see a woman with fishnets and think, “she looks like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman”.
What’s not okay is to form that opinion and STOP at it. He’s a grumpy sod, end of. She looks like a prostitute, end of. She can’t handle her stress, end of. He’s gay, end of. That’s not how it works. In science, after we form hypotheses, which is the “unproven” theory, we do not stop and rely on the hypotheses; act all “if the result does not turn out to be similar with the hypotheses, then it is wrong”. We open our minds for all the possibilities that might (and might not occur) after the experiments are done and the proven results are obtained. Even after the proven results are obtained, we still have room for “tolerance”. The controlled environment, the scope, the uncontrolled variables, the unexpected factors, the possible deviations, and all sorts. There is only one truth, indeed, but in order to achieve it, one should always have the room for every possibility. For reason.
“He’s a grumpy sod”, then you act as upset as he is because he deserves it.
“She looks like a prostitute”, then you catcall her because, hey, she must be used to it.
“She can’t handle her stress”, then you look lowly toward her and slip some undermining remarks about how awful she looks like with those baggy eyes.
“He’s gay”, then you disown him.
There are reasons behind every single thing. You just don’t look close enough because you don’t want to.
“He’s a grumpy sod. He must have had a bad day”, then you act politely, thank him after the ride, and wish him for a good day.
“She looks like a prostitute. Ah, she’s going to a costume party”, then you shouldn’t and don’t catcall her. Look at her respectfully like how you want to be looked at.
“She can’t handle her stress…oh she just got divorced…”, then you shouldn’t and don’t look lowly to her and make undermining remarks. Encourage her and make her a cup of hot tea, or if you cannot do any of those, just shut the hell up and act politely.
“He’s gay. But he’s my brother and I love him”, then you shouldn’t and don’t disown him.
By being able to see a reason behind every single thing, then you will see that there is so much that you missed for stopping at the hypotheses. Only then you can learn how to control your thoughts.