How to Not Be a Bad Facsimile of Yourself

Martin Stellar
Nov 7, 2016 · 2 min read

You’ll have heard it before, the widely served advice to be yourself.

To keep it real.

To be authentic.

But what is ‘authentic’?

How does one effectively keep it real?

And, what should you do to be yourself?

All these are so intangible, so indescribable… it’s hard to know what you ought to do, in a practical sense.

So instead, think of what *not* to do, that’ll make it a whole lot easier.

Yesterday I heard the brilliant Liz Strauss say it on her podcast, better than I’ve ever heard it:

“The more you try to become something you’re not, the more you become a bad facsimile of you”

Boom, nailed it.

There’s no reason to try to be anything other than the pure you, there’s no point in it.

Even your flaws and shortcomings (which in most cases bother you a lot more than they bother others), they are part of who you are.

No need to hide or downplay them.

In fact, you can use flaws to your advantage.

Because everyone has skeletons in their closet.

Everyone without exception.

And to quote George Bernard Shaw:

If you can’t get rid of the family skeleton, you might as well make it dance.

Meaning: being unashamed about shortcomings you have will be appreciated by people.

Moreover: pretending you don’t have any is an obstacle to trust.

Because we all know that nobody is perfect.

And someone who appears to be perfect?

Well they’ve got to be hiding something, right?

And we don’t trust it when people hide things.

So, don’t become a bad copy of yourself.

Don’t try to be something you’re not, and you’ll be your own, beautiful, flaws-included, authentic and real self.

And you bet there’s going to be people who resonate with exactly that self that you are.

And if you want to but you need some help getting over the hump, muster up the courage?

Then maybe we should talk.

Here’s some info about what it looks like to work together:



Originally published at

    Martin Stellar

    Written by

    Copywriter, ex-monk, marketer, singer, recovering artisan. Lover of life, helper of people.

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