The more complex the process of creating outcome X, Y or Z, the less control you have over what the ultimate outcome will be.
Complexity means moving parts, and unpredictability.
Frying an egg has few moving parts, so creating a tasty breakfast is pretty much under your control.
But something like building a thriving business, that’s an enormously complex interaction of moving parts.
And you’ll never control the market, or Facebook’s algorithm, or public opinion of your business, or the decision-making process of your buyers.
At best, you get to exert influence.
Rationally, we all know this. It’s obvious.
And yet, most people act as if they are entitled to the control they don’t have.
It shows up when you hear things like “Why isn’t this working better?”, or “It’s perfect for them, why didn’t they buy?”, or “I’ve worked so hard at this, and I’m still in debt!”.
If ever you notice yourself going down rabbit holes like that, know this:
You’ll do better — and you’ll certainly feel better! — if you bring your questioning back to the one single thing that you can control:
And the best thing to gain control over, is your mind.
Not in a clutchy, rigid way — that would only frustrate you.
I’m talking about the gentle, kind, self-loving type of control that comes from becoming an observer.
See most of us live as actors. Not in the sense of performing artists, but as ‘an individual committing acts’.
And while you’ll never be free of that, it’s severely worth your time to try and become a perceptor.
Meaning: someone who pays close attention to what goes on — in your world, your business, your relationships, and above all: in your mind.
Because that beautiful little machine you have runs 24/7, and nearly all of your thinking happens in grey areas.
We’re only aware of a small part of our thoughts, and maybe as much as 99.9% of our thinking is automatic and unnoticed.
So if you want to have the best kind of influence on the outcomes you’re working for, become aware of your thinking.
I promise you’ll find a ton of thoughts that do nothing but cause frustration, negative emotions, or irrational and dysfunctional beliefs.
And the more aware you become of how your mind runs, the easier it becomes to steer and influence your thoughts.
In other words: to gain a gentle kind of control — to replace ineffective thinking with more constructive thinking.
And that way, you’ll create different decisions, which will have a better effect on all the moving parts, and make it more likely that you get the outcomes you’re doing it all for.
If you’re ready to get serious on your results, and you agree that yes, it’s all in your mind, then maybe we should talk.
I’ve some 25 years of experience in this type of thing, and I might be able to help you create a better life and a more thriving business.
So if that’s what you want for yourself, let me know.
Originally published at MartinStellar.com.