Should You Fall in Love?

It depends. If the consequence is that you get blinded, probably not.

Oh I’m not talking about anything romantic here, in an interpersonal sense.

Not that my heart is too withered to entertain the notion, but let’s say that so far, I’ve never been very good at relationships.

So today, I’m talking about falling in love with your ideas.

Your dreams, your vision, the mission you’re on and the plans you make in order to reach your goals.

It’s very — VERY — dangerous to fall in love with those.

Because when you’re totally enamoured with it, there’s a real risk you’re blind to the difficulties and the pitfalls that you’ll encounter along the way.

You know, going through the steps with rose-coloured glasses, oblivious to anything except how awesome and fun and easy it will all be.

Like a lady I spoke to a few weeks back: She has a plan to open a physical shop, in a high-end street where rent is super high, and she just KNOWS her plan is going to work. Can’t fail.

So I tried to have her see that there are certain risks, and that it’s good to have a plan be, and to plan for contingencies in case it would all go slower than she’s expecting.

But nope, she wouldn’t have any of it. Her plan is going to work. Full stop.

And for her sake, I hope it is.

But because she’s unwilling or unable to consider what to do if things don’t work the way she assumes they will, I’m concerned it’s going to be a very risky endeavour.

In the writing world, they say ‘Kill your darlings’.

Meaning: exactly those bits you write that you’re just so proud of, the lines and chapters that you know will blow people away… those are exactly the parts to scrap, ruthlessly.

And with your plans and dreams, it’s the same.

Don’t ever stop dreaming and working, but always take a moment to ‘kill your darlings’, to consider the worst case scenario.

Because when you do that, you force yourself to create a solution, long before the problems ever occur.

One benefit is that you will operate with more confidence, and another is that when things do get tough, you’ll already have a solution in place.

Careful with falling in love, because when you do, you just might end up blinded to reality. And there’s a lot of reality involved in building a business.

Want to have a companion to hold up the mirror of reality for you, as you go along?

Then get ye a coach. Getting my own was of the best decisions I ever made.

Will you make the same decision?

Cheerio,
 Martin


Originally published at MartinStellar.com.