Beginner’s Guide for Better Life

How to start changing our lives and where to start?

Marty Seinamets
Aug 9 · 5 min read
The image was taken by Aman Shrivastava.

I was sitting behind my desk one afternoon, and out of the blue, I realized that the life I am living is actually boring. Back then, my life was based on going to school in the morning and playing computer games after school.

That afternoon I had a long conversation with myself. By the end of that conversation, I understood that if I want to accomplish something in my life, I have to start acting. I have to start improving myself and my knowledge.

Something was woken up inside me. Some kind of motivation to work on making my life more interesting and creating more great experiences.

It was really hard starting off at first. New habits that I was working on, did not want to stick and procrastination was really often taking it over shutting the motivation down. At some point, I decided to try building new habits again. I started writing down my daily goals. This time it was easier.

It all happened more than two years ago, in 2016. When I look back to the effort I put in improving myself now, I am happy that I decided to start that amazing journey which is full of different experiences, lessons, and failures.

I wanted to share my story of me working on changing my life for the better. Sometimes other people’s stories are really inspiring, and there are a lot of things we may learn from these stories and add into our lives.

A lot of people work on making their lives better every day. There are also people who think of making their lives better but they do not know where to start from or how to start changing their lives.

With this article, I wanted to share with you how I started changing my life, and what kind of new habits I built first. All these activities were really strange to me and it all required reprogramming my entire mindset.

Start with figuring out who you really are. If you ask yourself that question, the answer should be obvious and one of the easiest questions someone ever asked you, but in reality, a lot of people do not know who they really are.

It was also a hard question for me. I thought why someone should ask such an easy question but when I wrote that question down and tried to answer it, it was not that easy. It all was like having an interview with myself.

Write down goals that are important to you. Daily goals, short-term goals or long-term goals, we are talking about all of them here. Focus on working goals that are important to you. It is necessary to set goals that are realistic.

If you start writing down daily goals at first, it does not matter how many goals you write. What you are really focusing on now is building that simple habit of writing down your daily goals. At the same time, you are working on your skill in building habits. Building habits is a skill, too.

When I started writing down my daily goals, I wrote down around seven to nine things I wanted to accomplish that day. Later I understood, it is not possible to accomplish all of them in one day. Then I wrote down six goals each day and I felt like it is the right amount of goals for a day.

Invest in your knowledge and mindset. Our brain is our unlimited database where we can store a lot of new information. Our mindset’s task is to filter the information received from the outer source and pick out the information that fits our personalities, believes and what we find useful.

I love reading books and different articles about business development, networking, and improving mindset. These books and articles bring new value to my life and help me to get closer to achieving my goals.

Become a great friend with failure. Failing is part of the process. We do something to gain experience, and the result might be a success or a failure. Of course, we all are aiming for success, but really often we have to deal with failures, sometimes even multiple times. Failing is not bad.

The main reason we do not want to fail is that we are influenced by other people’s opinions about ourselves. It is also one of the reasons we do not want to take risks and try new things. We are not scared to try new things and take risks, we are scared of what other people will think if we fail.

As a designer, I publish my work in my portfolio. I remember how excited I was to publish a new project I worked on because I was sure it will be popular and a lot of other people like it. Sometimes it did not happen.

It was an expectation I set for myself. I did not feel really good and I thought that I wasted my time. Later I understood that failing is actually a great thing because it tells me that there is still room to improve my work. I would have stopped improving if every project I published met my expectations.

Compare yourself to yourself, not others. Sometimes we compare ourselves to other people who have achieved more and may have a more interesting life than we do. It is normal to see that world around us, and we may find some motivation and inspiration from the outer world.

At that moment, when we start comparing ourselves to other people and start questioning our value in this world, we start having that unhealthy relationship with ourselves. It starts affecting our everyday life some way.

I compared myself to other people and asked questions from myself. For example, what I have done wrong or why they are more successful. Now I compare myself to the person I was yesterday and it is all that matters.

Even if you still find yourself comparing yourself to other people, do not ask these negative questions about yourself and question your value. If someone has more money than you do, ask yourself what you have to do to get more money or as much as they have. It is all about our mindset.

The experience of living is actually interesting. We cannot change our lives if we always think negatively about ourselves in the first place. I believe that everything starts from our mindset and how we see the entire world, what kind of values we have and how we prioritize our lives. What is most important is how we see ourselves. Thank you for reading this article.

Marty Seinamets

Written by

Digital Product Designer & Junior IT System Specialist.

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