If You Have Been Told You Are Weird — This
I was born when I wasn’t supposed to be. The army chaplain who facilitated my adoption said that my biological mother had tried to abort me, but I survived. Twice. Thankfully, without lasting effects. I was adopted at birth by parents who did their best and were very supportive but never understood me. It was also a time and place that didn’t understand or value my gifts, and tried very hard to shut them down.
Like everyone, I’m most myself with my closest-to-Source creative brilliance and genius expressed. But because my light fell outside the spectrum of what was accepted by the mainstream as a child and young adult, I was shushed and told I was weird and wrong by teachers, schoolmates, authority figures and my own father.
Maybe, no matter what your birth situation or where you grew up, something like this happened to you too. It can be heartbreaking, being shunned and told you’re wrong day in and day out. It can break your spirit. You have to be strong then, if you’re lucky to have an advocate as I did my mother, listen to them.
You were born the way you are and given the impulses you have for a sacred purpose. That purpose is not revealed at birth or in high school or young adulthood unless you are very, very lucky.
My mother never stopped saying how good and smart and right I was, to not listen to those who dogged me down. That I was OK. It took me many years, mom’s staunch advocacy and some damned good mentoring I was lucky to get before I understood that they I was repeatedly shut down because when I was most myself and coming from my heart, it frightened people dedicated to preserving the status quo. I did, thought and said things the Establishment rankled at.
Where exclusivity was the norm, I deeply knew inclusion was the right thing to do, support and fight for. When the establishment shut down women, gay, trans and non-white voices, I stood up, along with others. I shared my heart, when it wasn’t popular or safe, I explored religions the mainstream hated or were scared of, because deep inside me a core of truth knew it was what I needed to do, that it was right for me.
And I wasn’t alone in this, though when I was a teen, there were damned few of us around. But slowly, I became aware there were others doing the same things, standing up for the same values, who weren’t scared of them or putting them down.
The numbers of weirdos standing up, grew. And there were increasingly more. More whom I accepted who accepted me. It was amazing, but it did happen. Just as it happens to thousands of weird people every day.
When I look around today, my teenage kind of weird has gone mainstream.
Women are being listened to and our voices count. People are now wise to the fact that putting poisons on crops is a bad thing. We care about keeping the earth clean and habitable for our many-greats-grand-children. Imperfect though they still are, we now have laws against racism, bigotry and hate-crimes.
We are now valuing non-hetero and neuro-atypical people as different but no less valid human expressions on the spectrum of “normal” …whatever that might be.
At first I was scared my voice would be the only one — it wasn’t. It never was.
That’s the point — we who are weird, who don’t fit in because we are here to help change the world are not alone. It may seem that way at first, but that is an illusion.
You are not alone. You never have been.
If you are persecuted for being weird, as long as your kind of weirdness is about helping others and not hurting anyone (including yourself), then just know that you are okay, that you’re not the only one, and there are others just waiting for you to find them.
Don’t stop looking for other weirdos, and don’t lose heart! There is a place for you, and you *do* fit in. Maybe not where you are right now, but I promise you, there is a place for you. And you will find it.
And you are safe, loved and supported, oh so very much by a universe that put those impulses in you to start, nurture and maintain a revolution in consciousness, to help us all grow towards better than we are by ourselves.
Look for us.
We are here.
You are not alone.