I come to you today, as a defunct human. A human who not only realizes her weaknesses but her flaws as well. My flaws are defining me. I have severe depression.

Words cut like knives, actions crumble my insides, and thoughts, are morbid and shitty.

Living with depression is hard. Not like 9th grade algebra hard, life hard. Life is not some plan you are given. You literally just follow other people’s actions and assume that’s where you’re supposed to be because hey! So and so is there, I should be too. Wrong.

We are all given a mastery plan but we are left to figure it out. The only clues given are hobbies and the personification that defined us growing up.

I’m lost. Lost daily. It is so hard not knowing even an ounce of a clue to where I belong, what I should be doing, etc. this “plan” has made me lose my sense of purpose, my sense of being.

I will write more later.