Coaching beyond beliefs
one of the most pervasive beliefs that i have learned along the way has been, that change happens by changing our beliefs.
I have learned that that is partially true.
I am learning, that something else happens before that.
I am learning that belief change is more of an effect.
An effect of touching something beyond our beliefs.
The more that i coach and look in the direction of our true nature, the more i see, that challenging and giving importance to beliefs begets defensiveness and more beliefs about beliefs.
I used to think that i needed to get better, to be more gentle, be more skilled, be more tricky or maybe be better with words, have better metaphors to ‘get under’ the skin. Or maybe even to be nicer, bader, funnier or learn some other tactic, strategy, skill, personal characteristic to change beliefs.
All from the belief that i can help people change if i can pinpoint their limiting belief and then help change it.
Sometimes it worked and sometimes it didn’t.
I still Sometimes think that the answer to a powerfull coaching conversation lies in belief change.
Less and less.
Since it usually leads to frustration and blaming others for not being open or courageous enough for change.
I have been looking in the wrong direction.
The direction of improving the ego, improving my personal mind.
There is a different way. There is more. And it is.
We all know it.
Its simple, beautiful, ordinary, still, peaceful, infinite
Its unafected by our memories, thoughts, feelings, happenings, others, weather, location
Its always here
Its quietly borning and dying
Its the source of our experience
Its the source of our potential
Its love and understanding
Its all in one
We cant talk about it, we cant see it, we cant give it away
We know it
We are it
What can i do with this as a coach?
Nothing, because it is doing me. It is I.
It is the change, the question and the answer, the belief and the energy, the mind, the body, the rock and the sky, love and hate, good and bad, its the judgement and the understanding. Its the search and the find. The leader, the follower, the victim and the perpetrator. Its the flower and the seed, the earth and the universe. The green, the yellow, blue, white, black and the purple and orange. The known and unknown.
Its the wind, the breath, the space