Do you remember…?

I think I was three or four when we first met. My father and I went to your house 'coz your television needs to be fixed. Maybe, I’d really like to go with him so I guess he can’t just leave me behind whenever he needs to go somewhere. I can’t remember in detail but that’s how our friendship began.

After that day, I always go to your place. Played so many games, also tried roller blades, skateboards which an average kids don’t have but you do. Good thing my mother lets me, even though our house is hundreds meters away from yours. Fortunately, you and your family moved-in just right in front of our crib. We helped you on taking some your things from the old one to your new home. And I enjoyed it because we’re like just playing, like what we always do.

I don’t remember the first time I slept at your house, but that’s a lot if we are to sum it all. All we do was watch TV, or help you with chores if your mom requires you to do something. You had a mini-store way back then. I remember knowing the prices of the items. Maybe not all, but most of them.

Growing up, we went to different schools. But every summer seems to the best season, as we can do almost everything again, together. Riding a bike, playing text cards and basketball. There’s a half court across our street and it seems we like doing boy’s stuff, remember?

In high school, you were much busier. We rarely see other and we don’t talk that much. I was thankful with your store. I sometimes volunteered to go and buy something because I can get a chance to see you even a minute or two. And I’m so happy if you would go out and sit with us in that bamboo made long chair. Shared stories, laughed so hard and ate a lot, of course. But most of the times, you asked me to come inside your house especially if you’d want accompany aside from your brother when your mom is not there. I just go when she arrives. Yet, I always go home late being so shy to tell it. I don’t know if you can’t push me away, though.

I’m not sure if you knew, how sad it was when you went to Manila for college. That’s why I’m glad when you’re back and decided to take up nursing near at our place. It seems we became more closer than ever. You’ve shared a lot of stories about college, your friends, suitor, duties in hospitals and more. I was closed on taking up nursing as well because of that. Though I took a different program course, I’m thankful I was able to study at that same university as a scholar. You’re on your senior year and I was freshie. And, I’m so sorry for not calling you 'Ate' that time. It was just later on I’ve learned that I should.

There’s just one mistake that changed everything. I don’t know if it’s the only reason. I’m sorry I lied that night, told you that I already ate dinner before going to your house, but I didn’t. I’m sorry for being so shy to tell the truth. I’m sorry for not saying anything. I’m sorry for doing nothing. I’m sorry, whatever the reason I did that made you mad. I’m really sorry. You seems so upset with me the next day. So, I just go home knowing we’re not okay. I didn’t say anything and went out. And six months avoiding each other took place.

I just remember reaching out to you when you’re about to take board exam, and we’re both at Recto area. I’ve found your apartment, but I didn’t go inside the building. It’s late and I need to go back to my cousin’s dorm.

You passed the exam and became registered nurse. You went abroad, back and forth, and in different countries. Somehow, we still have communication. You spared some of your time to visit me with my family when you’re in a short vacation here. As time goes by, chats and talks were lessen until it’s gone. Memories fades and so our friendship, but not in my heart.

I realized that you’ve made a huge impact in my life up to now. You’ve shown me how to take care of others as you took care of me. You made me comfortable and feel at home when you’re there. You gave unconditionally, not asking if I could return those things back to you. Maybe, that’s the reason why you’re present in most of my dreams. I may deny it, but I always miss you. I hope I can tell you how thankful I am for our friendship, that I still look up to you, and you’ll always be in my heart. You’re not just a friend but a sister to me. Though we rarely talk, I’m happy to know you’re okay, and happier just to see your smile. If there will be a time you remember me or wants me around, I will not hesitate to come. And if you can’t recall, I will gladly share it all. So you can remember, to me you’re special.