Water Wisdom from Waterworld (1995)

Boys, things are getting real! It’s level 4 water restrictions in Cape Town now! I don’t even know what level they go up to, but I think it’s like a reverse amazon score, where 5 is the worst! Our water is basically averaging 2 stars, which is about the same as 1995 Kevin Costner movie “Waterworld”. If you are unfamiliar with this movie, it’s basically “Wet Max: Beyond Thunderpool”. It takes place in a world that is basically the opposite of Cape Town right now — in this movie water is everywhere! There is literally no dry ground except the bit that Kevin keeps in a jar to snack on.

Cape Town is like this, but the opposite. Dry World or something

Now, in this world of water, Kevin Costner is the hero because even though there is water everywhere he still drinks his own piss to be water wise. That’s fucking inspiring! I mean, I hope we’re still a little way off from the piss drinking stage, but I’m inspired to start flushing the toilet with the dregs of my tea, drinking only Sprite Zero, and recycling my night sweats by wringing out my pillow into the garden! I hope that Waterworld will guide you all too, maybe we will all evolve, like Kevin Costner did, and we will grow land-gills to filter moisture from the air!

This man can teach us so much


And remember, if all else fails, we can always become a one-eyed Dennis Hopper type warlord or an Immortan Joe style warlord. Good luck to you all.

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