I’d seriously chill about the American identity thing: the Regime is Global and it’s been doing everything in its power to skew and otherwise manipulate all types of identity (even some more bizarre and contrived identities) in order to consolidate the Regime’s power.
You’re spot on about that “servant” stuff: that’s utterly repulsive. Your friend’s (! who needs enemies?!) point “everyone has servants” means if you don’t have servants then you’re a nobody. Disgusting. I really think you should reaffirm and take pride in your American identity given the efforts of such as Douglas, Lincoln and so many others before and since to work that “servant” garbage out of American culture and law.