Have you seen that new show? ‘Netflix’?
I probably spend around half an hour a day watching Netflix. It’s this great new show that is clearly revolutionising television and pioneering an entirely new genre. The level of interactivity is well beyond the average 21st century programme and it even makes for great communal watching.
So basically the premise is that it’s a collection of movie posters that are organised into different categories based on how similar they are. Occasionally promotional photos for TV shows appear also.
The best part is that YOU get to be the one controlling which posters appear by scrolling along with your remote or finger or mouse or whatever. It’s like you’re in charge of the direction of the show. More power to us right?!?
So you could be looking at lots of posters for horror movies, then all of a sudden see a poster for a rom-com that you kind of, sort of recognise from a couple of years ago. Then, before you know it, you’ve been looking at pink posters of celebrity couples kissing, for five minutes! It’s just super.
When I talk to my friends and family about Netflix they say “Lol, I do that for at least fifteen minutes before I watch anything else.” I’m a bit of an addict, so I easily watch Netflix twice as much.
I’m often asked by some of my ‘smarter’ friends, “Why don’t you choose what you want to watch first, that way you have more time to watch your favourite shows.” Fools! I actually like watching Netflix. It is one of my favourite shows. Anyway, what do they know? They read books, pamphlets and other printed, physical text (yuck!).
All those beautiful posters, endlessly sliding along in a line for six quid a month, what an absolute bargain.
My only real criticism of Netflix is that it’s hard to tell when one season ends and another begins. You finish looking at all the posters, then the next day there will be a few new ones and some will be missing. It’s like they are constantly updating the content so the show will never end. Which actually, now that I think about it, is pretty cool.
Apparently you can click on the pictures and watch some other movies and TV shows. But why would you? Why go to the effort of making a ‘choice’ or being ‘decisive’ when you can spend countless hours watching Netflix?! That never ending stream of glossy images moving across any and all of your screens should be enough to stimulate those peripheral senses whilst you check social media.
Just think of the collective hours you’ve probably already clocked up watching The Netflix instead of selecting one of the pictures. I bet in that time you could have practiced baking your favourite cake or taught your worthless offspring how to ride a bike. Maybe you could have visited that dying loved one and perhaps finally mastered that guitar you bought. Or something equally as terrible and time wasting.
Netflix is here to stay. It is the greatest new show this season and every season, forever.
The End? No. Never.