A few things I’ve Learned
“Rules are for the guidance of wise men, and the obedience of fools.”
Write down your principles. What you stand for. What you’re willing to fight for. These should guide what you’re willing to let slide, and when you need to call in the calvary.
Write down your goals. Most successful people do.
Meditate 20 minutes every day. This is the single most effective tool at your disposal for maintaining mental health. To do this, sit in a chair or on the ground, and try to think of nothing by focussing on breathing in and out. When a thought comes, just forget it and focus on your breath again. This becomes really useful when you can snap into meditative mode when you get stressed.
Recognize that negative emotions are a waste of your time. When you feel angry, recognize how pointless it is for you to keep yourself angry.
Play the long game. Stack the bricks. Small improvements every day are way easier than a big jump every once in a while.
Don’t follow your passion. No one really knows what that means anyway. Do what sparks your curiosity. If that fizzles out, do something else.
As Jim Carrey said, “you can fail at something you don’t love, so you might as well take a chance on something you do love.”
“There is no greater force in the universe than compounding interest.” — Albert Einstein.
Be proactive. It will save you time and help you sleep better at night.
Read: How to win friends and influence people by Dale Canegie
If you’re not sure if you’re going to have enough money for something 2 months away. You won’t have enough money.
Have a solid command of language by maintaining a good vocabulary. Just don’t drop phrases like joie de vivre in normal conversation because people will think you’re an asshole.
“You are not required to set yourself on fire to keep other people warm.”
Only apologize if you’ve done something wrong, not because someone is offended.
Be strategically unreasonable. Your peers admire when you stand your ground.
Act as if. Imagine the person you’d like to be and do the kinds of things that person does.
Automate all of your bills. If you can’t do this because of cash flow, you don’t make enough money to afford your lifestyle.
If someone is negatively impacting your life and it can’t be reconciled, cut them out of your life immediately.
Don’t lose your cool. It might seem cathartic to really tell someone off, but this usually has limited upside. It also makes you look unprofessional. Don’t ever raise your voice to people in a professional setting.
Be eccentric. Be known for doing something distinctive. This helps you be a more memorable person by giving people an avenue to live vicariously through you. This indirectly elevates others’ perception of you.
The clearest sign of maturity is a having a slowness to respond. Immature people try to have an answer for everything and think they have to voice their answer immediately to be taken seriously. The opposite is true.
Don’t fear death. Everyone does it. You will too. You don’t get more points for living longer. So, have some fun now.
Quoting any kind of data in an argument makes you 100 times more credible.
If you say things like, “studies have shown” and expect people to take you seriously, you better be able to cite that study on the spot.
Maintain agency. Don’t wait for someone’s permission to do something. It’s almost always better to beg forgiveness than to ask permission.
The people paying you the least cost the most. Do whatever you can to work with people who value what you do.
Never compete on price. Someone is always willing to go lower and drive you both out of business.
“Most men die at 25, but aren’t buried until 75.” — Ben Franklin.
When trying to be convincing, recognize that people naturally look for a narrative arc and take advantage of that. Vonnegut says it best.
Ask for more money than you think you’re worth. You’ll probably get it.
Like most things, dating is a numbers game. Keep playing and you’ll win eventually.
Don’t give second chances.
The night is darkest before the dawn. Remind yourself that things always get better.
If you ever find yourself crafting a fantasy in your head about how you’re just magically going to get something, (a job, a girl, etc) and you start to rely on that fantasy, recognize that it’s probably not going to happen, and have a backup plan.
The key to being either hilarious or terrifying is being specific.
People get rich by putting all their eggs in one basket and aggressively defending that basket. People stay rich by diversifying.
Always be ready to walk away. You will have the upper hand in a negotiation if the other party knows you have other options.
Silence is a powerful tool. Use it often. People will often volunteer information that they shouldn’t just to fill the space.
Find a mentor. Every successful person has one.
Don’t tell people how much money you make. Don’t brag about how much you make.
Be mysterious, people think less of you when they know all your tricks.
Don’t ever expect someone else to stand up for you. When the times comes, they probably won’t.
No one owes you anything. No one deserves anything.
Don’t do or say things that you wouldn’t be able to stand by if other people knew. Even if you have secrets that are embarrassing, be able to defend them should you need to.
Don’t blame other people, even when it really is their fault.
Leadership is taking responsibility when you don’t have to and when you don’t want to.
Admit when you’re wrong, often. It builds trust.
To get the most out of money:
- buy more experiences and fewer material goods;
- use money to benefit others rather than yourself;
- buy many small pleasures rather than fewer large ones;
- eschew extended warranties and other forms of overpriced insurance;
- delay consumption;
- consider how peripheral features of your purchases may affect your day-to-day life;
- beware of comparison shopping; and (8) pay close
attention to the happiness of others
From: “If money doesn’t make you happy, then you probably aren’t spending it right”
Shower people with praise when they do a good job. Be tactful with criticism when they don’t.
If you fail and need to explain yourself, be straight and to the point. Then ask what needs to be done to make things right.
In an interview, you should never just sit there and field questions. You should act as if you already have the job, and turn the interview into a session where you’re working on a real problem you’d encounter. Ask one hundred and one questions. Get out of your chair and walk around the room if you need to.
The point of meetings is not to make a decision. Meetings are to confirm decisions that have already been agreed upon. So, make sure you know exactly how everyone is going to vote before the meeting starts.
Be accountable. No one should doubt that you can be trusted to deliver.
Be punctual. Even if it’s not your fault for being late, it doesn’t matter, you will still be perceived as an asshole.
You’re special. If someone tells you that everyone does it one way, confidently state that you are an exception to the rule, and stand your ground. This works more often than you’d expect.
Don’t make a habit of comparing yourself to others. Unless it helps you set goals for yourself, there isn’t any real upside. The downside is irrational depression. No one is ever doing as well or as bad as you think.
Be nice to people. Each person is silently fighting a battle you know nothing about.
Over-communicate. Seriously. Have I made that clear?
Sometimes you succeed or fail for reasons that are unclear or completely out of your control. Recognize that it’s the same for other people too.
When it comes to your career, don’t re-invent the wheel. Have a novel take on something someone else is doing successfully.
People talk. So, don’t talk trash, the other person will definitely find out.
If you spend enough time thinking about a problem, you eventually start to see opportunities that most people miss. This is called having “domain expertise.”
There’s no such thing as an overnight success. They either have been working on that problem for years and it’s the first time you’ve heard of it, or they had a lot of help from someone else who has.
Luck is when preparation meets opportunity. Make your own luck by creating an environment that routinely delivers opportunity.
Living according to someone else’s expectations is pointless. You get pressure from other people to move along a certain path because they want someone they can relate to, so you can both be unhappy together.
There is little evidence that life is, in fact, serious. So, Acknowledge when you’re having a good time.
