Fan Jacket

Those Starter Jackets? The ones for all the pro sports teams? Those are the shit, kid! Everybody on the South Shore (south of Boston, kid) has the Patriots one (South Shore baby! Ya heard?). My boss, Jeff, just got a brand new one. He’s okay. Sometimes he can be kind of a douche but he’s been alright about my court dates and all that. I mean, he had his own DUI about six months ago so he really can’t say much. Anyway, he has the Patriots jacket which is the one I am going to get this week because the Pats are in the Superbowl, baby! Sully has the Pats one, Dunnie has it, Mikey, Joey, Malph, and Big Sull has the Pats and the Sox jackets. He got his disability check a few weeks ago so he’s been livin’ large. I’d love to get both but my ex has been needing money and my ma is always bustin’ my balls about spending money on stupid things. A Pats jacket is stupid? Yeah, I’d look pretty stupid watching the game at Pat Flanagan’s without it. What would Da Crew think? Da Crew! Don’t get it twisted!

I been tryin’ to save up but something always seems to be happening that I have to spend money on. Gas for the car, I had to have it inspected which was another $95 outta my pocket. That DUI four months ago was a huge hit. My insurance went up, what a fuckin’ headache. I also owe my mom a bunch of money and she doesn’t like me going out to South Side or Pat Flanagan’s too much. She says the other night that she doesn’t like me going out “all the time” but I don’t go out “all the time”. I like to go out and watch the games and I gotta buy beers and stuff or I’ll look like a cheap asshole.

Last season people were kinda giving me shit because I didn’t have the jacket. They were saying that I’m not a real fan and stuff like that. Malph was all in my face and I can’t stand that dickhead anyway. He’s Sull’s second cousin, whatever that means and he’s been hanging around like he part of Da Crew. He doesn’t even know Da Crew! We been hangin’ out since 5th grade at Lakeside and he went to the fuckin’ faggot ass Catholic school til his parents got divorced and his mom pulled him out. Then he starts comin’ around, late gamin’ it. He’s like, “Where’s your jacket, dude?” to me. And I’m like “I don’t have one yet.” And he’s like bein’ like I ain’t even down. Uh, check out the video we shot on Dunnie’s (Dunnie Dun Dun It!) iPhone for Da Crew’s rap song. Are you in it, douche? No! (We’re puttin’ it out on You Tube: “Da Crew’s goin’ out, and we’re drinkin’ beers!You know we’ll be flexin’, so ya better be in fear!” It’s gonna blow up! Word son!)

So, I gotta get one or I’ll look like a total pussy. Speaking of which, I gotta get me some of that too. And the ladies like a man in a Starter Jacket. I think it shows dedication to something larger than myself; women like that in a man. I was gonna ask my ex, Sherri-Ann, if she could loan me the money and I would pay her back but I still owe her for the cable bill for the last month we lived together (at least that’s what she says) and the X-Box. I figured that was a gift but I guess I did ask her for it. But she never played it? Come on! But whatever. I don’t like to argue over petty stuff.

The good thing is that I have a really good, broken in Red Sox hat which looks really good. A fan hat. So, the Starter Jacket, some Pats sweats and some t-shirts, maybe Celtics…and Bruins! Damn, I forgot about that. See, with all my court bullshit and my job and Sherri-Ann’s bullshit, and my mom…it’s hard to focus. Ritchie T has this fuckin’ pissa Bruins jacket and Sox blanket. His uncle got him the job With Con Ed so he so he’s hooked up for life. Some guys got all the luck…but he’s a good guy. Paulie D though, he’s a punk. Been like that since Lakeside. Lakeside Boys!!! That was da original Crew! You know it, Kid!