Day 5: Red Eyes and the Great Green North

After an all-too-brief visit to the Pacific North West, it was sadly time to say goodbye until a month down the road.

Now it was time to head north of the border to where I swear literally everything has about 10x too much sugar…

To get to Canada, I had to drag myself onto a red eye flight with a short connection window, just what anyone wants to do when their body clock still doesn’t know what the fuck has hit it!

After a 6 hour wait in SeaTac in which I discovered a lack of outlets for phone charging and the absolute wonders of McGriddles (Australian Maccas, what are you doing not making these?!)(And yes, I know this is turning into “Matty Discovers New Food”) I finally got to board my flight towards the second country of my journey.

The flight took us first to Minneapolis/St Paul, the great Twin Cities of Minnesota, but I didn’t get to enjoy any of it, firstly because it was 4am where I’d just flown from and secondly because I had roughly one hot minute to dash to my connecting flight which was already boarding across the other side of the airport!

After piling into tin can number 2 for the day, we were on our way to the land of maple syrup, hockey and Tim Horton’s and I hadn’t caught a wink of sleep (more on that later).

Mercifully, Canadian customs is not nearly as tedious a process as literally any that I’d dealt with up to this point on the trip, being in and out of it in about 10–15 minutes, which both myself and my Canadian host found astounding, but congratulations Canada, great first impression!

Waiting for my pick-up, I took out some cash (So good to have coloured bills again!) and made my first Tim Horton’s purchase, a sausage english muffin that was sadly disappointing.

The drive from Pearson Airport to Guelph wasn’t too bad, but I can’t honestly say I was anything less than an absolute zombie… My host decided to take me to a specific Tim Horton’s on the way back that they took another Aussie to previously where someone tried to barter with him for some vegemite… not a word of a lie.

I said “get me the most Canadian order” to the welcoming lady serving us and she got me a double-double and a maple-dip donut as well as a bunch of Timbits (basically the cut-out holes of the donuts rolled in frosting and flavour) and told me that “this is what us Canadians always get, welcome to our country!” The lovely girl was stoked about being in a photo for an Aussie blog, so congratulations to her, she’s made it!

This was just sugar. Seriously. The double-double is full of it and the maple dip donut was just sugar covered in sugar with some sugar added, just in case you need it a little sweeter.

After getting back to my lodging for the week, I watched some baseball that was actually on during daytime hours as opposed to trying to watch it back home and poorly attempted to nap, which was foiled by the Tim Horton’s love of all things sugar, and headed out to explore Guelph.

A walk along the river was lovely and relaxing and we stopped in to a bar for a cheeky pint before heading back home. This is when my complete lack of sleep thus far hit me for six. Despite the fact that it was only 5 in the afternoon and there were plans that night, I put my head down on the pillow and was done for the next 12 hours. Massive apologies to the lovely family putting me up, but I was so spent that there was no point in me trying to even string a sentence together, much less engage in a family dinner.

I’m not sure exactly what the plan is for the next few days, so we’ll discover that together in the next couple of entries! Right now, I think it’s time for some unsweetened coffee and a big old breakfast.

Matty Abroad.

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