So You Want to Be an Absolute Political Dictator?

This job requires stamina, drive, and an iron will. Not recommended for the shy type.

May Alba
May Alba
Sep 7, 2016 · 2 min read

The following test was created by Fran Lebowitz as “Vocational Guidance for the Truly Ambitious”. The idea behind this test is that some jobs are more difficult than others so it is advisable for the applicants to be sure that they are really suited for the job.

The following questions will help you figure out if you have what it takes to be an absolute political dictator:

1. My greatest fear is …

a. Meeting new people.
b. Heights.
c. Snakes.
d. The dark.
e. A coup d’etat.

2. On a lazy Sunday afternoon I most enjoy …

a. Cooking.
b. Experimenting with makeup.
c. Going to a museum.
d. Just lounging around the house.
e. Exiling people.

3. I think people look best in …

a. Formal attire.
b. Bathing suits.
c. Clothes that reflect their life-style.
d. Bermuda shorts.
e. Prison uniforms.

4. When confronted by a large crowd of strangers my immediate reaction is to …

a. Introduce myself to anyone who looks interesting.
b. Wait for them to speak to me first.
c. Sit in a corner and sulk.
d. Start a purge.

5. The proper manner in which to respond to a chance meeting with me is by …

a. Smiling.
b. Nodding.
c. Saying hello.
d. Giving me a little kiss.
e. Saluting.

6. When someone disagrees with me my first instinct is to …

a. Try to understand his point of view.
b. Get into a pet.
c. Discuss it calmly and rationally.
d. Cry.
e. Have him executed.

7. Nothing builds character like …

a. Scouting.
b. The YMCA.
c. Sunday school.
d. Cold showers.
e. Forced labor.

Donnie T., you are 2 answers away from your dream job.
Keep up the fantastic work.


Test: Fran Lebowitz, Metropolitan Life.

May Alba

Written by

May Alba

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