Dog Cage

we’re halfway through the month. i am at a starbucks, leeching

off of the electricity, the internet, the energy trying to get

work done. in front of me a young man and a young woman

discuss her new job. her experience has been something

pertaining to fundraising, investment at google. me being here

right in the center of the FiDi in San francisco, these

conversations go on all of the time. young milennial girl,

making a lot of money, but take a look at her, she’s just a

regular girl. nothing too special that i can see. all of these

people really. but who knows maybe there’s a super hero or

heroine, amongst them.

i am a full week into hunting for a job. it’s not so much a

brutal grind as a feeling of being watched, analyzed,

critiqued, surmised before contact even occurs. the woes of

the internet age, where these recruiters, and hiring talent

ascertain whether you’re a good fit for their company, the

culture by a profile picture and a quick glance at that

presence.

in my email in box, its littered with job openings from one of

these myriad job boards, it makes me sick. most of this is

filler, fluff, an automation pinged out.

and then i find an email from one of these zen companies, a

rejection letter, stating that they have deemed me not a good

fit for the company. not the skills they were looking for. the

position they want is a simple account executive, a

salesperson. nothing too difficult. but they glance at me,

they glance at my solar history, and because it is not

specifically a SaaS (this decades buzzword) role, it is not

good enough.

i read a piece from paramahansa’s sermons today and it summed

up the essence of a true salesman, regardless of what industry

she might work in.

‘i have never forgotten the remark of a fione salesman in a

large shop where i was selecting an overcoat for myself. ‘sir’

, he said ‘ i am not trying just to sell you something; i am

trying to find out exactly what you need.’ he did not try to

sell me the most expensive overcoat; he showed me a less

expensive one that exactly suited me in every way. i was

pleased to get what i needed at a reasonable price. thus he

secured in me a permanent custoemr for his company.’

this all comes to mind as i examine and go through the job

acquisition process in this soft, tech atmosphere. these

recruiters hide behind all of these technologies, laying

judgement at will, at a distance. that is the woe of our

genreation i think. having a hard time getting out there and

saying hello. face to face.

i have an interview in a few hours with a Sales Recruiting

service, they’re called Bretts, or something. it was one of

three that is actually attempting to work with me. that’s why

i’m here sitting in starbucks, a soft jazz playing, a white

woman with red hair takes the empty seat next to mine. i make

a joke and a plump friend of her’s sits down across from her.

they fall into convseration. the red, casually crosses her

legs, and i catch on to that sentiment. i feel the squeez of

her two thighs together, the fire from the center. she’s in

tuned with me and subtlely recognizes the feeling. when i

adjust, so does she.

i guess it’s not to bad huh? one must keep trucking on past

all of these empty types. on to the grand goal. the shining

star in the sky.

i google the recruiting place. it’s kiddy corner down the

street 245 front st, right nex to the embarcadero bart stop.

right angled from market and probably a ten minute walk from

me.

hopefully i can get it right, and they see the radiance

pouring forth from me. that i mean business.

i imagine meandering down there, loved stoned, and blowing

them away. getting on me knees and pleading for help, because

why not?

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