we’re halfway through the month. i am at a starbucks, leeching
off of the electricity, the internet, the energy trying to get
work done. in front of me a young man and a young woman
discuss her new job. her experience has been something
pertaining to fundraising, investment at google. me being here
right in the center of the FiDi in San francisco, these
conversations go on all of the time. young milennial girl,
making a lot of money, but take a look at her, she’s just a
regular girl. nothing too special that i can see. all of these
people really. but who knows maybe there’s a super hero or
heroine, amongst them.
i am a full week into hunting for a job. it’s not so much a
brutal grind as a feeling of being watched, analyzed,
critiqued, surmised before contact even occurs. the woes of
the internet age, where these recruiters, and hiring talent
ascertain whether you’re a good fit for their company, the
culture by a profile picture and a quick glance at that
in my email in box, its littered with job openings from one of
these myriad job boards, it makes me sick. most of this is
filler, fluff, an automation pinged out.
and then i find an email from one of these zen companies, a
rejection letter, stating that they have deemed me not a good
fit for the company. not the skills they were looking for. the
position they want is a simple account executive, a
salesperson. nothing too difficult. but they glance at me,
they glance at my solar history, and because it is not
specifically a SaaS (this decades buzzword) role, it is not
i read a piece from paramahansa’s sermons today and it summed
up the essence of a true salesman, regardless of what industry
she might work in.
‘i have never forgotten the remark of a fione salesman in a
large shop where i was selecting an overcoat for myself. ‘sir’
, he said ‘ i am not trying just to sell you something; i am
trying to find out exactly what you need.’ he did not try to
sell me the most expensive overcoat; he showed me a less
expensive one that exactly suited me in every way. i was
pleased to get what i needed at a reasonable price. thus he
secured in me a permanent custoemr for his company.’
this all comes to mind as i examine and go through the job
acquisition process in this soft, tech atmosphere. these
recruiters hide behind all of these technologies, laying
judgement at will, at a distance. that is the woe of our
genreation i think. having a hard time getting out there and
saying hello. face to face.
i have an interview in a few hours with a Sales Recruiting
service, they’re called Bretts, or something. it was one of
three that is actually attempting to work with me. that’s why
i’m here sitting in starbucks, a soft jazz playing, a white
woman with red hair takes the empty seat next to mine. i make
a joke and a plump friend of her’s sits down across from her.
they fall into convseration. the red, casually crosses her
legs, and i catch on to that sentiment. i feel the squeez of
her two thighs together, the fire from the center. she’s in
tuned with me and subtlely recognizes the feeling. when i
adjust, so does she.
i guess it’s not to bad huh? one must keep trucking on past
all of these empty types. on to the grand goal. the shining
star in the sky.
i google the recruiting place. it’s kiddy corner down the
street 245 front st, right nex to the embarcadero bart stop.
right angled from market and probably a ten minute walk from
hopefully i can get it right, and they see the radiance
pouring forth from me. that i mean business.
i imagine meandering down there, loved stoned, and blowing
them away. getting on me knees and pleading for help, because