on leaping

There is something boiling inside of me, it might be due to the beginnings of Summer or the fact that I’ve been doing a lot of body work trying to release stuck emotions and memories. I feel like things are heating up. Like I’m on the verge of creating something profound or taking that next step in my life.

Everything happens in divine order, that’s what my mom always says. This week I realized that my boyfriend is a complete asshole and that I should probably leave him, I declined a job I was offered although I’d been wanting the position for an entire year, and I committed to my plans to move across the country. Many things happening in a period of four days, possibly due to mercury in retrograde but who really knows it that has any effect on things.

I’m ready to take a leap of faith. It’s not like I haven’t done it before. There’s that quote; “Leap and the net will appear”, which is always in the back of my mind. I decided to come to Boston for grad school on a whim, I took a leap and everything worked out. It was a messy landing, but I found my bearings eventually.

I can’t help but feel that the universe or whatever is directing me to follow my dreams. Opportunities within my desired field of screenwriting are opening up and the things that no longer “serve” me are falling away, i.e. asshole boyfriend. The things that were keeping me here in my current state no longer seem relevant and I’m okay with that.

Today I am at zero. I can’t think anymore. I need to just be and breathe and let the next door open. I need to trust that the net will appear, because it will and I will be okay and everyone around me will be okay. That’s all. Something is boiling inside me and it’s about to break through the surface and I’ll be ready.