News of the Day (June 12th, 2017)

Mitch mcmahon
Jul 24, 2017 · 3 min read

Opioids

Trump Care is creating a rift within the republican party as the bill would roll back an expansion, that under Obama, allowed those with drug addiction (namely those suffering from opioid abuse) to seek affordable treatment. The rollback would effectively allow insurance companies to charge extreme premiums to those suffering from drug addiction, or even deny treatment coverage to addicts all together.

When asked about why he chose to impose these provisions Trump cited Trainspotting, the film by Danny Boyle that highlights the lives of heroin addicts in Scotland, as his primary motivation. Trump said, “I was shocked by how easy, and cheap it really is to quit opioid abuse. Simple. Just look at Ewen McGregor. He did it with nothing but soothing music, tomato and mushroom soup, vanilla ice cream, magnesia, paracetamol, mouthwash, vitamins, mineral water, Lucozade, pornography, one mattress, one bucket for urine, one for feces and one for vomit, one television, and one bottle of Valium. Now that’s how you quit opioid abuse. If congress would spend less time arguing about me, and more time watching Danny Boyle movies we would all be in better shape. We’re going to make recovery great again for the American people”.

Bachelor in Paradise

Filming of Bachelor in Paradise has halted amidst allegations of misconduct. A source close to the show says that the misconduct stems from a famous politician making a surprise appearance and, well, things got a little too “grabby” for some peoples comfort.

Wonder Woman makes feminist film festival debut

Wonder Woman, the new hit movie produced by DC films, has been scoring up big numbers at the box office grossing a total of 205 million dollars to date.

While many are hailing the film as a step in the right direction for the way women are portrayed in hollywood films, some are calling for a deeper critique of the film.

When Wonder Woman made its debut at the UC Berkley Feminist Film Festival this past week, student Bridget Moreau, leader of the “Proud Pronouns” activism group, claimed the film as “offensive, and intrusive to an inclusive, multi-sectional, bipartisan, brothel community”.

Bridget would go on to say, “The film really just reinforces the patriarchal, esoteric view of a social climate doomed to rot under a system of gender suppression” as she took a deep drag from a free-trade cigarette made in the caves of Iran.

Bridget is also quoted saying, “The film just assumes that Wonder Woman is a cis-gender amazonian devoid of any uniqueness. Why can’t Wonder Women be a trans tiger from the galaxy of Safron who is both gender neutral, while also portraying a feminist mystique equivalent to that of a child made from the fusion of eggs between Lena Dunham and Nancy Pelosi? These are the conversations that aren’t being had because our society puts priority over commercial value rather than creating Cinema of substance” speaking between taking bites of a grass fed, free range kale pancake.

While Bridget makes some strong points, I think we can all agree that Wonder Woman is sure to be one of the best films of the summer, and a beginning of a revolution for women in hollywood. Whether that revolution includes a child borne from the fruits of both Lena Dunham and Nancy Pelosi no one can quite say for sure. But boy are we hopeful.

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