I’m Leading My Son into Sin.
After my son started blogging on The Gay Catholic, I felt compelled to blog my own journey alongside him as a Catholic mother of a gay son. I thought perhaps my struggles, my faith, and my journey could help others. And I think it has.
I get very kind messages. I also get some not so kind. One in particular that I’ve gotten more than once is letting me know I’m a horrible mother for leading my child into sin.
I don’t get angry at the negative comments. I don’t even feel hurt by them. Sometimes I just smile at the irony or hypocrisy.
I’m “leading my son into sin”. I’m not sure how anyone can know that, especially people who don’t know me well. I’ll take a guess at why they assume I am leading Aaron into sin: It’s because I support my openly gay son. But there’s more. They assume that by supporting my openly gay son I am also telling him it’s okay to sin. Absurd.
Some of the passive aggressive comments I get are from people I know in some way. These kinds of comments fascinate me. You know why? Because I know these people. I know their children. I know things about their families, also. I know about their sins, their moral relativism, and their secrets. Do the self-righteous even know they’re self-righteous?
I know good, Catholic parents who have heterosexual children who live with someone before marriage, who use contraception, who have been divorced and remarried without an annulment, who are promiscuous. Should we start messaging those parents to let them know they’re leading their children into sin? Of course not. So, why is it okay to do it to parents of gay children? It’s not.
See, the thing is, just because we love our children unconditionally, we are proud of them, and we stand by them does not mean we are condoning all their actions. Just because I know Aaron is an openly gay man in a same sex relationship doesn’t mean I don’t have conversations with him about how he can reconcile himself with God. Just because Pope Francis met with prisoners, doesn’t mean he condones their actions. Just because Jesus “hung out” with sinners didn’t mean he was okay with their actions.
Be careful when making assumptions, judging people, and try asking yourself if people see you as self-righteous. You see…..Jesus was harder on the self-righteous than he was the sinners. Be careful.