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When I was five my six year old neighbor boy held me down and tried to pull my tights and underwear off in a very aggressive manor. When his mother and mine finally came to investigate my screams of protest, I was told that “boys will be boys”. I can’t ‘prove’ this, yet it still happened.

I don’t fancy myself a feminist in today’s sense. I recognize struggles and negative messages and stereotypes that virtually every group of people inherit from society. From the culture of the individual family, to the culture of humanity as a whole, we all inherit negativity and a legacy of pain and suffering. But we also inherit the good, and that’s what we should try to perpetuate.

What I am trying to say is that while I recognize that nowhere near all men approve of that type of talk or the actions that talk refers to, there are appalling behaviors from males that females are conditioned to accept and not make a big deal out of. This is a very sad thing for both sexes. It sends a message to males and females that males are perpetrators and females are martyrs. As a mother of boys and a girl, I find it a sad and unacceptable message on both counts. I would rather send the message that it is beautiful to be male and beautiful to be female. I find it very sad that the worst behaved among us are the ones who are dominating the landscape and thereby defining what it is to be male, female, members of a particular race, or even what it is to be human.