It broke me a little when I saw the #metoo posts flood my newsfeed on Facebook tonight. It started at 7am (Singapore time) on Monday, as the night descends on Jakarta (1134pm) and through Tuesday morning, the posts continue to flood my newsfeed.
Size 0. Size 14.
Size 36 shoes. Size 9 sneakers.
Australians, Americans, Singaporeans, Polish, Germans, Indians, Malaysians, Jordanians.
At the office, on holiday, at school, on the train. By a friend, a partner, a trusted mentor, a boss, a teacher, strangers.
They were hurt. And while these monstrous individuals will always have an excuse: alcohol, drugs, miscommunication, an “unintended” slip up or my favourites — “Come on, they wanted it” or “You fucking loved it”, remember that they hurt someone.
These aren’t memories that go away easily and they take a long time for some to want to talk about it and even, accept that it happened — that they, were stupid enough to have let it happen or that they didn’t listen to the warning signs. A lot of the time, it’s a blame game — did you do something to trigger a response? What should one, have not done?
Today I’ve seen about 30 posts, from those willing to share their experiences in my immediate circle of friends and acquaintances. I salute you all- each and everyone of them, for having the courage to share your experiences and to have the strength to make it through another relationship, to be able to open up to someone.
To those who haven’t — it’s alright. You owe no one, your story. You’re not weaker, you’re not hiding — you’re just present in your moment. You never have to talk about it, if you don’t want to. Just know that it doesn’t define you, it’s not your future and you’re not the only one. Will it happen again — frankly, no one knows.
But we can protect ourselves, and more importantly — we can trust ourselves & the people around us.