I like that the things that go through someone’s head when calling a suicide hotline are the same strange contradicting thoughts that go through someone’s head the rest of the time. I like that it’s not all straight forward. That it’s not all clean cut and expected. That it involves both self-deprecation and self-forgiveness. I mean, ideally there wouldn’t be the self-judgement in the first place, but let’s be realistic for a second, if you’re contemplating suicide, you’re depressed, if you’re depressed and your depression is anything like mine and, well, most people I know anyway, you’re spending a lot of time shitting on yourself when you really don’t need to be, because that’s what depression does.
In fact, the self-forgiveness part is amazing. An amazing beautiful win full of hope from my perspective.
Thanks for this glimpse into your head, here’s hopin’