7 major lessons to learn from “It Ends with Us” by Colleen Hoover. Complete Book Summary.

“Love is not enough. It is not enough to say ‘I love you.’ Love is not enough to keep a relationship alive. It is not enough to make a house a home. Love is not enough to mend a broken heart. It is not enough to mend a broken anything. Love is not enough.”

Quick Brief:

The story follows the life of Lily, a young woman who falls in love with Atlas, a successful businessman. However, their relationship is complicated by Atlas’ past and the secrets he keeps. The novel deals with themes of love, family, and domestic abuse. It is an emotional and heartbreaking read that will have you question about the true meaning of love and the sacrifices we make for it. Read on to learn about the 7 major lessons that the book teaches about love.

Insights:

The story highlights that life is full of challenges, and it requires strength, courage, and resilience to overcome them. The love story also deals with the idea that life is not always fair, and that sometimes good people can make bad choices and mistakes.

The main character, Lily, is faced with difficult decisions and must come to terms with the truth about her relationship with Atlas, which has been full of toxicity and instances of domestic abuse. The novel also explores the sensitive nature of a woman who can go to lengths to protect the ones she loves.

Colleen Hoover in “It ends with us” also presents the idea that love is not always easy and that it requires respect, sacrifices and understanding. Lily’s journey in the novel is one of self-discovery and the understanding that love can be painful sometimes.

The novel illustrates that life is complex, and it is full of difficult choices, however, it is also full of love and hope. The story is a reminder that it is important to take responsibility for our actions and the impact they have on others, and it is never too late to make things right.

Full Summary

The story begins with Atlas, the ex-boyfriend of the main character, Lily, who reappears when she develops feelings for Ryle. After several years of not seeing or hearing from Atlas, he contacts Lily out of the blue and expresses his desire to reconnect. Lily is hesitant at first, but ultimately agrees to meet with him. During their meeting, Atlas reveals that he has been in therapy and has worked to change his past behavior, including addressing his history of domestic abuse. He apologizes for his actions, expresses his love for Lily, and hopes that they can start over.

As Lily spends more time with Atlas, she begins to have feelings for him again. However, she also has feelings for Ryle, whom she has been dating. This creates a conflict for Lily as she struggles with her feelings for both men. She is torn between her past with Atlas and her present with Ryle, and must make a decision about which one she wants to be with. The tension and conflict caused by Atlas’ reappearance in Lily’s life create a turning point in the novel, as Lily must confront her feelings and make a difficult decision about her future.

Lily confronts her feelings, What decision does she make?

Lily confronts her feelings for Atlas and Ryle by being honest with herself about her past and present relationships. She reflects on her history with Atlas and his past behavior, acknowledging that while she still has feelings for him, she cannot ignore his past actions. She also looks at her current relationship with Ryle and recognizes that he is a good and supportive partner, who loves and respects her.

Through this process, Lily comes to the realization that her feelings for Atlas are rooted in nostalgia and a longing for the past, whereas her feelings for Ryle are based on the present and future potential. She also understands that the love and safety she needs cannot be found in a relationship with Atlas, because of his past behavior.

Lily’s Decision:

In the end, Lily makes the difficult decision to end her relationship with Atlas and chooses to be with Ryle. She acknowledges that while her past with Atlas was important, it is time to move on and focus on her present and future. She also decides to take care of herself and be honest with Ryle about her past.

It is important to note that this decision is not easy for Lily, it takes her time and contemplation to come to this realization. The novel shows that when it comes to love and relationships, the decision making process is not always clear-cut and easy, it takes courage and self-awareness to make the right choice for oneself.

7 lessons to take from “It ends with us” by Coollen Hoover

1. Respect: In a healthy relationship, both partners respect each other’s boundaries, opinions, and feelings. In an abusive relationship, the abuser may disregard their partner’s boundaries and belittle their opinions and feelings.
2. Trust: In a healthy relationship, both partners have trust in each other and are honest with one another. In an abusive relationship, the abuser may be controlling and possessive, and may not trust their partner.
3. Communication: In a healthy relationship, both partners are able to communicate effectively and address any issues that arise. In an abusive relationship, the abuser may use communication as a tool of manipulation and control.
4. Equality: In a healthy relationship, both partners have equal power and agency in the relationship. In an abusive relationship, the abuser may exert power and control over their partner.
5. Safety: In a healthy relationship, both partners feel safe and secure. In an abusive relationship, the abuser may use intimidation, threats, and physical or emotional violence to maintain control.
6. The strength and resilience of the human spirit: The novel deals with the idea that life is full of challenges, and it requires strength, courage, and resilience to overcome them. It is a reminder that even in the darkest of times, there is always hope, and the human spirit has the ability to persevere.
7. Love should not hurt: Love is sweetly possessive not super possessive, Love does not hurt physically or emotionally, it is not jealous, it does not control or manipulate.

My take:

Love is not perfect, it’s complex and messy, but it is never toxic or abusive.

It’s all about putting oneself first before choosing someone we genuinely love and care about. It highlights how important it is to make a decision to stop a cycle of violence that causes more harm than good. This novel showed me how women experiencing domestic abuse could feel conflicted between loving a person they made a pledge to love and their own personal security, and how gray domestic abuse can feel when sincere love is at risk. Sometimes the consequences of our actions can ruin our future, so it is important to make amends in a relationship whenever necessary. Finally, the novel is a reminder of the importance of self-discovery and self-care, and the need to take care of ourselves in order to be able to take care of others.

Quote from the book: “It’s not that I don’t believe in love. I believe in love more than anything. It’s just that falling in love with the right person at the wrong time can be just as damaging as falling out of love with the right person at the right time”

PS: It’s important to remember that abuse can take many forms, including physical, emotional, sexual, and financial. If you or someone you know is in an abusive relationship, it’s important to seek help and support.

Take Care