Beginning Again

As school ended last year, I was questioning why I would ever come back. That first year was a terrible beating yet awesome at the same time. However, the beating was so severe that at the start of summer, I wanted to run away from school and never come back.

As I considered running, I stumbled upon an article in Mathematics Teaching in the Middle School titled “Establishing Standards for Mathematical Practice.” The author, Michelle Stephan details how she used the first days of school to start introducing Norms that corresponded with the Mathematical practices. Stephan lists six strategies she used to start building those practices. I highlighted this article till my ink ran dry. There were three of the six strategies that I wanted to adopt this year — Hold Students Accountable for Explanations, Hold Students Accountable for Asking Questions, and to Hold Students Accountable to Questions what they do not Understand.

As last year ended, the discourse in my classroom gradually disappeared. I did not understand how to keep the discussion alive. None of my students seemed interested in thinking for themselves, grappling with difficult subject matter, or in speaking at all. It was driving me crazy. I wanted to find ways to really emphasize the importance of collaborative discussion in the classroom. I wanted my students to question, seek, understand, discover — that is how they were to “make sense of problems and persevere in solving them”, “reason abstractly and quantitatively”, “construct viable arguments”, “attend to precision”. I believe in the Mathematical Standards — I believe in their power. I needed a classroom environment where they were alive and thriving.

This year started with me “stating my expectations early” (another of Stephan’s strategies discussed in her article). The first day of school, I put a problem on the board, set the stage and tried to hold my students accountable. Throughout the day, I strived to challenge my students to make sense of their thinking and the thinking of others. When students started sharing their solutions, I discussed the expectations of the others as the one presented. I asked them why we listen. They responded with great answers — to understand that student’s method, to show respect, to learn. When the student was done explaining, I sought for questions. Initially there were few, but as the days have progressed — the questions have been coming out.

One thing that Stephan describes in her article is that teachers should expect that if students have no questions then they should be able to restate the thinking of the presenter. I have tried to hold that expectation as well. I feel like it has made a difference. I ask for questions. If there are none, I have been calling on others to explain the explanation again. Sometimes, the restating was very rote, “she took 12 and divided by 4 to get 3.” At these reiterations, I would press for a deeper understanding with questions like “Well, where did she come up with the 12 and the 4?” or “Why did she decide to divide? What about the problem makes that operation the key?” As I’ve tried to hold that expectation and press for deeper understanding, I noticed an initial wall of hesitancy and unsureness, but as I continued to press and expect the wall has slowly started crumbling.

There was a moment, a moment where I lost my confidence. I asked a student if they had questions and they said no. Then I asked if they could re-explain, to which they also said no. They said it so emphatically that I was hit up against my own wall of hesitancy — I didn’t know what to do or say to perhaps inspire them to open up even just a little. I may have been able to say something to unlock their minds, but in the moment I was at a loss. How do you open minds that have no discernible door? As my experience grows, I hope I come to find an answer to that riddle. Keep trying is all I have at the moment.

However, overall, I feel good about the beginning of the year. I feel like I have begun creating an environment where some fantastic mathematical discourse can occur — some great thinking can come out.

Due to the experience I had last year, I questioned my future in education.

BUT! But, I have a vision, a dream, a passion. I want to inspire young minds. I want to show the infinite possibilities that surround them. I want to encourage and lead. I want to pass my love of mathematical reasoning onto them. I want to share the passion I have for math and life with a group of hormonal, developing adolescents.

So, I absorbed Michelle Stephan’s experience and am making it my own. I am so glad there are people out there who are doing what I dream about accomplishing. It makes it seem that much more possible.