How to Find Love at Starbucks
Because nothing says romantic like finding your life partner in the same place you get your vanilla lattes from.
“All love stories are tales of beginnings. When we talk about falling in love, we go to the beginning, to pinpoint the moment of freefall.” — Meghan O’Rourke
So let me start at the beginning.
After several years of dating I realized that I a) wasn’t good at it (at least that’s what I thought) and b) was kissing a lot of frogs with nothing to show for it. Looking back it was obvious that I just didn’t know what I wanted. Sure, I wanted a companion, a best friend, a partner for life…I mean who doesn’t? But I didn’t know myself well enough to be confident in the choices I made. Thus, I found myself being attracted to the wrong types of men, or in my case, boys. I think this is called ‘settling’ in grown-up talk.
So you can imagine my surprise/happiness/excitement the day I met my now husband, Jay. It was like any other day, really. I had just finished class and was planning to gather with a few of my friends for dinner. I had been craving a Starbucks drink all day so decided to make a pit stop before heading to the restaurant. I stood in line as I watched people make their orders and pay for their drinks. I noticed a guy patiently waiting in front of me, eyes glued to the menu ahead. He caught my eye, so I decided to make a comment about the slow service that day (even though I could care less, since it meant I could keep staring…I was doing it inconspicuously, I promise). He replied and we continued to share a few words as we waited.
Little did I know that this person would end up being my husband three years later.
“First best is falling in love. Second best is being in love. Least best is falling out of love. But any of it is better than never having been in love.” — Maya Angelou
We decided to continue our conversation in the small food court located on the second floor. I mean, what did we have to lose? He was cute, interesting and had an incredibly drool-worthy accent. I was hooked. I don’t even remember how the time passed so quickly because next thing I knew, I was getting angry calls from my friends asking where I was ( I was over an hour late). They were clearly the last thing on my mind at that point. So, I told Jay I had to go, even though I didn’t want to, gave him my number and left.
When I got to the restaurant, I was interrogated on my whereabouts. I pulled my good friend into the bathroom to tell her about my evening. “I think I just met my husband,” I said. “Ok, whatever,” was her response.
It’s unbelievable to know what cards you will be dealt with in life. But at that very moment, I knew that things were exactly as they should be. And I wasn’t wrong. We moved in together four months in and have never looked back. And then in the spring of 2013, he proposed. In the midst of the Swiss Alpes, surrounded by blowing wildflowers, I was asked a timeless question.
And as we approach the five year mark, we not only have a stronger friendship and relationship together, but a beautiful daughter to show for it.
So, let this be a lesson to those struggling to find love. I know the quintessential thing to say is that love finds you when you least expect it — and this can be true in some respects. But from my experience, it’s the right type of love you should be seeking, and it doesn’t come easy. So chase love; don’t let it find you.
Chase the possibilities. Chase the chances. Chase the happenstances. Create your own love story.
The only way you’ll know what you want is by fully knowing yourself. So, stop hoping and start looking. Sometimes you have to take those risks in order to reap the rewards. Imagine what would have happened if I never said hello?
That one simple word changed my life forever.
So kiss a few frogs, take a few chances and make a few leaps — you never know when you’ll find that prince or princess.
Or, you can just get lucky and find them the next time you’re ordering that latte ;)
Originally published on my personal blog.