8 days in: 2019 already better

For many, and as I mentioned in a previous post, the prospect of 2019 being better than 2018 just HAD to be true. And so far, so good.

I started this year with a couple of concrete goals:

  1. Clean a small area of my home every day (so far: bedside table, vanity, meditation space, book shelf, file cabinet).
  2. Train for a 5K in June (Run Against the Sun in Indianapolis, IN).

I’ve been up at 5:30 am for TWO days in a row running on my treadmill. Husband isn’t thrilled (I mean, he is TOTALLY thrilled that I’m taking my health seriously and have set reachable goals…he is not as happy about the time of day I’ve chosen to exercise…I should reconsider evenings?).

Last year, my goal was to live. I did that pretty well. This year, with my word being “Focus”, I feel like I can master my own goals.

My whole life I’ve felt this strange pressure to create a resolution on January 1 of each year. To be honest, I’ve always struggled. First of all, I haven’t really felt like I needed to change or quit anything. I mean, if I did, I just did it…I didn’t wait until a new year. Second, a resolution is like a really really firm agreement…with who? Myself? I let myself down all.the.time. Why would making a resolution be any different?

It wasn’t. I tried. I mean, aside for the “Live” thing, I failed at every resolution every year. Mostly because I didn’t really believe in it. It was more like, “Oh, I guess this is a thing I need to do.”

What I’ve succeeded at FAR more is the 30 Day Challenge. Choose a thing to do, do it every day for 30 days. At the end of 30 days, decide if you still want to do it and how often. This is how I started hand writing notes, drinking more water, sorting through clothes, not cussing. (I haven’t kept all of those. {Well…I’ve only NOT kept the cussing part.})

Watch the 30 Day Challenge here. It’s only three and a half minutes long…and it’s totally worth it: https://www.ted.com/talks/matt_cutts_try_something_new_for_30_days

So creating the two goals that I have for this year really appeals to me. First, my house is only so big. There IS an end point. And, of course, I’ll have to go back and tidy up…but, hopefully, I’ll have made it a habit and it won’t feel so overwhelming. (also, to be noted, Husband does a LOT of work around the house. It’s a partnership…I’m not the only one doing things. The children, on the other hand…)

Note: One thing not really talked about with CANCER is that your house totally becomes a back-burner reality. You live there, you do not do anything else. Your caregiver (Husband) and you (if you’re up to it) cook food, do laundry, wash dishes. Maybe vacuum once a month. But…the general cleaning doesn’t happen. You’re too tired, stressed, distracted. Things pile up. A thick layer of dust and dog hair falls over the land. Your home looks like one of those places in the movies that some detective finds a body that’s been there for YEARS. Hence, my goal of tidying.

Double Note: I’ve also started watching Tidying Up on Netflix…which is amazing and I find drive and inspiration from this show. Basic. I know. Whatever. shut up.

The exercising bit is a LOT harder for me. I hate running. I hate sweating. I hate showering every day. It’s just such…blah…I don’t know. A waste of time. I mean, I know it isn’t. But I always think, “I could be doing so many things!”

Here’s the truth that I had to swallow about that: I could be doing so many things, but I won’t.

Yup. I would just…do the same things. And I had to really, deeply decide that just living wasn’t enough and I want to REALLY live. I want to keep up with my kids and go hiking and biking and adventuring and I don’t want to be obese and I want to wear clothes that don’t resemble a tent.

I also know myself enough to realize that I love food (and beer) and I’m not going to stop eating (or drinking). And if I keep it up, I’ll just get huger and huger. SO, since I won’t stop eating, I better start exercising. So I am.

Having the June goal to participate in the Run Against the Sun feels sort-of like a celebration to me. I mean, running in a 5K 18 months after a cancer diagnosis is cool. And me running in general is cool. And bringing awareness to melanoma is NECESSARY.

It’s a really really really good goal and, dare I say it? Resolution.

Here’s to you, 2019! Eight days in and you’re already better than last year. Great job! Keep it up!