Confused About Object Permanence

Do People with BPD Remember You Exist when You’re Not with Them?

People with BPD have object permanence. They lack object constancy and emotional permanence.

This means they remember you exist but that their ability to maintain their positive feelings for you when you have hurt them is —

Thom Gonzalez via Pexels

Iffy.

It also means they sometimes struggle to believe your feelings for them remain constant when you’re not around them.

So…

• They know you exist when you’re not around them. They know you know they exist when you’re not around them.
• They struggle to remember they care about you when you’ve hurt them or sometimes when you’re not there.
• They may not always know you care about them when the two of you aren’t together.

This obviously impacts their relationships.