Fight or…Fight

My Trauma Symptoms Play Themselves Out in My Sleep. I Make Moves Like I’m Fighting My Father. Why Am I Doing This?

This is actually a good thing.

It means your trauma is very close to the surface and that both your body and your mind are trying to work through it.

This is rare.

People mostly can work through their traumas in their mind, but they rarely release them through their bodies.

This keeps them stuck. Unconsciously. In the trauma.

Sleep issues. Clenched jaws. Stooped posture. Back problems. These are all signs people are keeping their trauma within their body.

I personally have a problem with tightness in my chest. I can’t figure out how to get rid of it. I woke up this morning with an image of a V opening outward from my chest. There were these sort of waves. Emanating. From the vortex and into the atmosphere.

This means push that shit out.

I have a problem with turning my anger in on myself. I keep it inside. Anger turned inward leads to depression.

I don’t want to be depressed anymore.

I’ve been writing these very angry Quora posts. Because I have to get this anger out. Last time I was this angry, I went crazy.

I don’t want to go crazy again.

So, better to look like a lunatic —

On Quora.

Than to be one.

You’re angry. You’re angry as fuck. This is playing out in your sleep as your body tries to play out the motion —

You weren’t able to play out as a child.

You have no idea how healthy this is.

Or how many people will never get to do it.

Your body is working through at night what you’re —

Rightly.

Not going to do during the day.

But I suggest you do do it during the day.

By taking up boxing.

Nelson Mandela took up boxing. He was —

Also.

Justifiably angry.

And didn’t know what to do with it.

So, he took up boxing. And he credits it for helping him to work through his trauma and to become the Nelson Mandela we know today.

Boxing would be good because you’re already acting out that motion.

Fight.

But you could try martial arts. Or kickboxing. Anything to help you play out that motion. And to continue playing out that motion.

Until you’re done.

We get the idea from movies like Good Will Hunting that trauma recovery is one and done. That we have our come to Jesus moment and then we’re through.

But it doesn’t work like that.

You have your come to Jesus moment. And then you have it again. And then you keep having it until your mind has processed and your body has released —

All of it.

All the trauma.

You, my friend, are on your way.

Now see it through.

And know that some of us —

Are jealous.

This article first appeared on Quora.