Lessons From A Business Sabbatical
As we move through the thick of Scorpio season — this season of death, transformation, pulling things to the surface, opening to rebirth — I got the urge to write about the most significant death of the year for me.
No, a loved one didn’t pass away or transition, but someone and something definitely died — old parts of me and my business of seven years. In March 2022 I decided to initiate a business sabbatical as a practice of radical self-care for my mental, emotional, and spiritual/energetic renewal. And additionally, hoping to explore other paths where my skills, gifts, and passions can possibly expand. I spent almost the entire last decade serving women and BIPOC folx as an Embodiment Guide, Mentor and Healing Facilitator which has always felt like the deepest alignment, but that feeling of alignment began to fade behind deep burn out, 2020 ‘pivot’ syndrome, Instagram fatigue, and a strong feeling of “it’s literally time to STOP.”
So with much reluctance, resistance, but no doubt…I stopped. Let me just say here, resistance and doubt are indeed, different. You can feel resistance to something and still know, understand and feel its correctness for your growth; for your wellbeing. I begin to dig deeper into this part of my story in Episode 0 of my podcast. You can tap in below.
Little did I know, the journey through this sabbatical would stir up a deep semblance of ego death, feelings of dissolving and disappearing, existential dread, a sense of worthlessness, self betrayal and self judgement. It was a death. But, as I’ve been allowing it to, this journey has also brought a new perspective about seasons of purpose, taking a step back as a metric of success and an imperative return to creating and letting my work exit into the world simply because it’s good for my soul. I have learned and experienced SO MUCH more, but I’ll stick to these three musings for now.
So, let’s dive into each:
Seasons of Purpose
From childhood all the way through our adult years, we are taught to “find your purpose” and that once you find it, you should try and tie it to the work your do for a living, to make your purpose your job. And in addition to that, purpose is perceived as something that looks the same, feels the same, is carried out the same for our entire lives. That through every era of personal change, transformation and re-birth we experience, the way we live out and through our purpose should be constant and unchanging. Through this sabbatical journey, I’m learning that is just not true or realistic.
Our purpose a.k.a who we are and what we uniquely contribute to this world, is the constant, the means through which we share and live through it, can change in tandem with our own personal transformations. Human Design guide, Christie Igne said it precisely, “Your purpose is not a job or career, or some mystical thing that you need to go on a deep and long quest for. Your purpose is who you are. It’s the mark you make no matter what you are ‘doing’ on the outside.” I couldn’t have said it better. For example, for the past seven years I have been facilitating in person and virtual sacred spaces for teaching/guiding movement, creating online courses, memberships and broadcasting my message to huge audiences on social media and beyond. I made the mistake of believing that if I wasn’t doing those exact things anymore, in the exact way I have been doing them for almost a decade, then I was no longer in alignment with my purpose. I made the mistake of becoming attached to a timeframe, staying to myself “I’ve been doing this for X amount of years, this way isn’t thriving anymore, so I’ve failed.” This is the rabbit hole we fall into because of our obsession with time and attachment to what has been made socially acceptable in terms of what it “looks like” to succeed and what it “looks like” to fail.
I started to became curious and began asking myself, “what if the way I have served and offered myself to my community was perfect and correct for that seven year period and things are crumbling and burning down because now its time to serve in a different way? What if in this new era, a new way of serving, living out and through my purpose is trying to reveal itself to me?” These are the questions I’ve gotten comfortable with asking myself, that have helped me reframe how I am in relationship with this sabbatical. These are also questions that we often don’t think to ponder because of the relationship we have been conditioned to have with purpose, work, success and failure.
These next two will be short and sweet…
Taking A Step Back As A Metric of Success
How many times in your life have you confidently taken a break from something? Allowed yourself to take a literal step back so that you can assess and process something while looking at it versus trying to assess and process it while being in it?
When I decided to take this business sabbatical, this break, it offered me permission to get off the “be productive for production sake” hamster wheel. To put down the paint brush, take a step back and look at the painting (metaphorically speaking). To see what was already on the canvas and consider what may need to be added, painted over or reworked. For most, taking a break or setting something down is viewed as quitting, giving up or failure. When really, taking a moment to zoom out, to stop, to pause, is a chance to refine what you are building. A chance to be receptive to new direction, new creative energy and innovation. Being able to trust this step in business or otherwise, is extremely wise and creates a pathway to success — inner and outer.
Letting Your Work Exit With No Expectation
I am living in this lesson and musing in this very moment. We spend almost our entire lives, especially in adulthood, creating things and expecting what we create to do something for us. That something could be to make us money, to gain us notoriety, to spread our reach, to get us validation and so on. We live in a patriarchal- capitalist society, so that explains it all. But we have forgotten the innocent art of letting our work, our creations, exit into the world and allowing that to be enough. My good sis D'Ana Joi and I dive deeeeep into this subject on an episode of her podcast, Multi-Passionate Mastery, called There’s More To Life Than Running A Business With Mel The Oracle. I actually repurposed that episode on my podcast — you can check it out below.
Devoting myself to this sacred practice is what led me to birth my podcast in June of this year, what led me to Medium to begin writing again and what led me to becoming more and more engaged with the community of people on my email list. Simply creating and sharing, without an agenda, without a direct goal, without expecting what I put out to bring something back to me. It has been the most terrifying, yet liberating practice to return to. It’s the inner child ‘work’ we often look past.
I hope something I mentioned here opened you up to a different perspective about work, business and following your inner pull to trust your personal seasons, rest and reframe your relationship with your purpose. I know I shared it twice here, but you can get more intimate with me by tuning into my podcast. You can click HERE to tune in!
Mel The Oracle is a mentor, yogini, voice artist, writer and host of the Full Ass Human Podcast. After initiating a business sabbatical in march 2022, she began to explore a re-dedication to her many passions. She supports her listeners and readers by vulnerably modeling humanness, teaching by living and reminding them to invite all dimensions of themselves to the table.
