Instead of possibly leaning on another person, have you thought about leaning on something else? Nature? God? A hobby? I realize that you gone to therapy and meditated and gotten better at being yourself, but that need for contact doesn’t have to come in the form of another person. If you are single and find yourself remaining that way, but don’t want to be, then you have to ask yourself if in the end it’s really you and what you are doing? Are you giving off a don’t come near me vibe? Do you have a preconceived notion of what a partner or a mate should be or must be like for you to cross divide from going from single to not single?
What is it about you that is keeping you from being not single? It has to be something from the obvious to possibly not-so-obvious. However, trying to figure this out may be fraught with danger.