Believe it or not, I tried to quit on at least 4 different occasions before I finally walked away. In fact, I even reached the decision of quitting once prior, and was talked into staying by my boss.
You are not alone, Ramnik — it is difficult. I am glad that my words could resonate with what you are going through and hope that it is helpful in some way. Sometimes, we ignore the items in our lives that need cleansing. We’re afraid that what we believe to be good for us, will actually turn out to be good for us. Because that means letting go and cutting those toxic things out.
Good luck Ramnik, I have no doubt that you will pull through this time in your life and find a solution that works for you. (: