self-awareness is a privilege

shut up. listen. understand.

I used to think that my mother got frustrated with me because she didn’t speak English well. That she was mad at not knowing the vocabulary to scold me in.

“You’re far more educated than me and I will get nowhere in this conversation. With your words, you will always be right.”

Then she’d huff away and begin cleaning or making dinner. It must have been cathartic because she always found a way to self soothe and calm her vexation.

And when I was younger, I would revel in the victory because my immaturity convinced me that I was, indeed, right.

—

In one of my earliest management roles, I took over a technical support call because the man on the other side was fuming and yelling.

He spoke perfect English.

His server had crashed and many months of customer data had been lost. We were the software company he hired, why couldn’t we miraculously restore it for him? Wasn’t that our job?

My associate explained again and again, that no, that’s not how things worked. And being very green, he too was convinced that he was, indeed, right.

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