Life Purpose Exercise

Questions pulled from https://markmanson.net/life-purpose.

What’s your favorite flavor of shit sandwich?

I’m ok with having a jam-packed life, as long as there are multiple elements. If one thing takes over, I’m less ok.

I’m ok with not following all the rules or doing everything by the book.

I’m ok with not everyone sharing enthusiasm for my projects.

I’m ok with being an underdog. I’m secretly pretty anti-establishment.

I’m ok with not being the most popular person in the room.

I’m ok with being put on the spot. I’m ok working under pressure.

I’m ok with opinionated, direct people.

I’m ok with really big, hairy problems.

I’m ok with “old boys club” men. I have a much harder time with clique-y women.

I’m ok with lots and lots and lots of detail.

I’m ok with misfits, dorks, and miscreants. I’m ok with loud people and quiet people. You can be touchy-feely vs. non touchy-feely with me, (just no line-crossing, obviously.)

I’m ok with lots of noise; crying, laughing, dialog, yelling.

What is true about yourself today that would make your 8-year old self cry?

I believed in magic. I used to be a lot more creative and willing to suspend disbelief. I was not as cynical.

I believed I belonged on a stage. I was less self conscious of a performer.

What makes you forget to eat and poop?

Storytelling. Explaining a big idea.

Stringing together all of the pieces of a project. (I obsess over things left hanging.)

I thrive on pulling together the big picture and I immensely enjoy the validation of introducing hoards of people to that neat, bow-topped big picture once the dust has settled.

How can you better embarrass yourself?

I actually feel like I risk embarrassing myself a lot. It’s part of my personal brand. My dirty little secret is that I’m actually not a perfectionist. I’m ok with attempting things and getting them only 70% right.

I’m embarrassed in some social situations. Outside of work, I let my husband lead a lot of social interactions. I’m not great at getting people to open up.

And I’m pretty cautious in my conversations with people. I’m willing to be vulnerable but not great at getting others to be. Maybe I’m not that relatable. I’m pretty opinionated.

I’m also not great about asking others to help me where I’m weak. For example, I know that I get excited and come on strong sometimes. I don’t always know how to get other people swept up in my excitement vs. feeling overshadowed by it.

How are you going to save the world?

I want to create a world where people can have it all; work, family, romance, health, and not just a powered up version of one. I want this for myself but also for everyone who wants it. There’s too much rhetoric out there saying you have to choose. And that balance isn’t possible.

Also, I want to create a world where it isn’t a given that the advancement of technology is going to shorten the longevity, safety, and security of future generations.

I want to create a world where living in the modern world and procreating doesn’t make you feel guilty and wrong. Like you’re eating dessert that tastes good but is terrible for you.

Gun to your head, if you had to leave the house all day every day, where would you go and what would you do?

I would go somewhere pretty similar to where I go now. Except maybe more light and outdoor space in our office, and the ability to see my son and husband at lunch once and a while.

But I love working with smart, talented, driven people to build something that feels big. I love the process of discovery, the formulation of new ideas and seeing big projects take root and establish themselves.

I love being part of actively managing the positive growth and development of an organization. Considering how we might make get better. My work is a tremendous place of progress. And it’s part of a very full and happy life. I work at work, but also sometimes in the morning before Myles wakes up and after everybody goes to bed. I rarely chase deadlines during off hours. I’m usually just fixing up a project so it’s more presentable, or doing a light weight but time consuming task, without the stress of meetings and more complicated work. So sometimes I enjoy off-hours work.

I pick my son up and go for walks with him. I have dinners with family and friends. I keep our house stocked and fed. I manage schedules.

Before Myles, maybe I would have joined a choir after work, or joined the community theater. But more likely, non-work time would be spent just enjoying more quality time with my husband exploring the city.

What keeps you from fully enjoying your life?

I would critique my ability to focus on the present. This hurts my ability connect to people more naturally. It’s very hard for my brain to not skim ahead to what I need to do next. I’m a natural multi-tasker and that sometimes hurts my ability to connect to people and live fully in the moment.

While I pride myself on my communication skills, I’m not great in every context. I’m a great communicator on paper, in long form and when given the chance to think. I’m much less talented at having the right words in quick, snippy conversation.

Finally, I don’t memorize things well. I’m a very visual learner, so transferring complex spoken explanations into digestible concepts is not easy for me. When I can ask questions along the way, I do much better.

If you knew you were going to die one year from today, what you do and what would you want to be remembered for?

I’d probably spend more time with my son. I’d spend time organizing things for my husband for after I was gone.

I’d get very focused at work on completing as much as I could before I left. So that I could leave behind something that made a big impact on the future of the world.

I would write a book on being a real working mom. Not a freelancer, like the authors of most of the b.s. books out there.

So why do I get up in the morning?

I want to squeeze the most of life. I want to do as much as well and as intensely as possible. I want my work to have a positive impact and be worthwhile. But honestly, part of my drive is derived just from proving to the naysayers that things they think are impossible, are possible.

And not because I’m a genius. Or especially talented. Because I’m willing to feel a little pain while I’m racing around the track.