New York Times Forced To Retract Longstanding Lie About Russian Hacking
Caitlin Johnstone
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My god people. For months, we have been protesting the president of our country, owner of our Social Security and Medicare and Medicaid funds, saying that the Russians had hacked our election, planted fake news stories about how Hilary Clinton, had financed the take over of our government by a person that they had infected with a Zombie Virus, (it’s OK, he won’t bite any humans, only Wendy’s Bigly Fries) and because of this, President Putin has gained complete control of our government.

Now, I’m not a conspiracy theorist, buy, I did not know that the Russians had been secretly taking over our Republican Congress for years. They have been holding fake Awards Dinners and inviting the Republican Congressmen and Congresswomen to these Dinners, offering to put them together with large financial contributor. These Republicans would go to these affairs and then they were escorted into back rooms, (ergo the term backroom politics). When they entered, they were injected with a zombie virus, by Russian agents, that took away all of their human compassion and caring behavior. The Russian agents then replaced these personality traits with there own personal traits that they were imprinted with by Vlad, the Impala. These personality behaviors were, conceit, moral turpitude and the wanton disgust towards the poor people because they can’t pay for their services. Then, these Congressmen, (oh, sorry, with Mitch McConnell and Paul Ryan, these Congressmen were very difficult to replace their humanity because they had none, and the Russian agents didn’t need to imprint the personality traits of, conceit, moral turpitude, and disgust towards the poor. These Congressmen had been practicing them for years. Then they send these Zombies out into the dinning room to eat their $5,000.00 a pea dinner, (plate, plate, darn spell check) and to mingle and escort the other congressmen into the back rooms. (That’s how they got Trump, he went to a special political dinner for his Russian partner, the head of the Russian moffeeia, Vito Bicarbonate. Also, this is where he met with his soon to be ex-wife Melania. She escort him into backroom and the rest it is history.

But, I digress.

Because of this trip to the G19 Summit in Hamburg, Germany, we now know that Russia and President Vladimir Putin did not do anything thing to hack our election or infiltrate our government or our Congress. How, you may ask. Well I’ll tell you, I say, I say, Because President Vladimir Putin told our President Trump, in a private backroom meeting for 2 1/2 hours, that he didn’t know anything about any hacking or anything about any investigation going on for the last several months about the illegal hacking into our Presidential Election. Of course when the leader of the not free world tells you this, with a smile on his face, you certainly have to believe him. And Putin told Trump that he has no idea on what he is asking him? His reply to this question is just so believable that he has made a believer of President Trump. And when Trump told us all that President Vladimir Putin told him this in their private meeting, he knows that it is true. And that we should believe President Trump because he doesn’t lie.

(the above article is a personal belief as told to me by the Dolly Lima.)

P.S. I may be wrong about where I heard this story.

P.S.S. There could be a certain degree of Artistic License on Dolly’s part. So if anyone wants to email Dolly, you can email your questions to,

cchanning@Hello.Dolly.org