Out on the road today, I saw a Metallica sticker on a Cadillac
A little voice inside my head said, “Don’t look back. You can never look back”
I thought I knew what love was
What did I know?
Those days are gone forever
I should just let them go, but…

Don Henley, Boys of Summer, changed slightly.

I have been dealing with some very heavy memories lately. As I come to accept the new reality of my life, I can not help but remember how my life used to be and there are times when some of the changes still hurt deeply. Sure there has been a great deal of growth and I have found new ways to be creative, but that has not come without a price. One of the curses of my mind is that I have a very strong memory of things going all the way back to when I was a toddler. I remember the joy of celebrations, the the cards, the gifts, the people I spent them with, and there are times when I miss that and long for that.

And thus the Don Henley quote. I find it rather appropriate as I am a huge fan of old Metallica from the black album and before. To me that music reminds me of high school and a much different time from today. I saw this sticker on the way to see U2 perform the Joshua Tree concert in early June. Again, I am a huge fan of old U2 music from Achtung Baby and before. “Don’t look back you can never look back” may be a rather strong sentiment, but there is still some truth to that. I was texting Rhoda the other day telling her how I dread the mid summer days leading up to my birthday because they remind me of the times of my youth. She reminded me to always keep focused on the good that is happening in the present. She reminded me to be happy that I am alive today and am working in new forms of art and taking my old art forms to new levels.

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