Christiana, being one of those who wrote a stinging reply I’m glad to see you clarified what I, in my own reply, tried to summarize as the point I thought you were trying to make. The part that was offensive to me was the implication that somehow the standards only applied to men. You could very well examine your life and see you may have surrounded yourself with women who were just as lethargic about attaining their goals. A wise man told me when I was 20 that if you want to be excellent, surround yourself with excellent people and that you can tell what you strive for by who you surround yourself with. So it is great that you have decide to explore your potential and surround yourself with people and date men who have decided the same thing. Just keep in mind when dating that men too are on that same path; a man who has decided to not even journey down it is clearly not worth your time if you have decided to walk down it. But a man on that path may not *yet* have homes and boats and cars and people who depend on him, as I gather you do not yet. He may in fact never have those things if his path/ambition is to teach inner school children, write books, protect citizens, or any number of careers that are important but don’t come with the trappings of wealth. He may be an entrepreneur who works harder than you can imagine to create something great that may just result in homes and boats and cars but hasn’t achieved that success yet. He is still on the path you have chosen and deserves and, IMHO, writing off these men because they don’t have the things you strive for when you try to attain your own potential is just as damaging as dating the men who did not before.