Is Anyone Immune to Having “Bad” Body Days?
I recently saw a video with model, body positive advocate, and author Ashley Graham where she said that she needs to reaffirm her worth daily. I think it’s hard to believe that even though she looks like a goddess (by societal standards), has earned millions of dollars, has helped to smash modeling stereotypes all over the world by donning her “plus” sized body on the most elite magazines, she still needs to affirm her worth daily with statements like:
“You are brilliant and beautiful.” and “There is no other woman like you, because you are your own kind of woman.”
What I love most about this video is that she makes it clear that her “body love” journey didn’t happen overnight. In fact, she admits that it’s taken her 15 years to realize that there is no one perfect body.
Even though she’s admittedly body confident, I’m sure she still has days when even she’s not comfortable in her own skin. In fact, I don’t think anyone (or an overwhelming majority of us), including myself, is immune to having a “bad” body day sometimes. It’s natural, expected, and “normal” to have them.
It’s normal because we’re human. After all, we live in a world that is obsessed with thin, lean, tall, young, perfectly white toothed, unblemished, usually white, and not all of us fit into that mold. I know that I don’t! Instead, we’re of average/above average height or short, larger bodied, petite, “yellow” toothed, larger framed, an array of ages, of all different races and nationalities, have rolls, dimples, and have wrinkles. And even though, on a rational level, we know that what we’re being shown daily isn’t a realistic representation of what our society actually looks like, it doesn’t mean we’re impervious to it all.
In fact, I don’t believe anyone is immune to occasionally comparing themselves to the images we’re assaulted with every single day. I’d say it’s unnatural for us not to occasionally shrink by thinking that the way we look, what we do/don’t do, what we have/don’t have, and just who we are isn’t enough.
However, just because we sometimes shrink and experience these feelings, doesn’t mean we need to get stuck there. It doesn’t mean that we need to make that disparaging, joyless place our norm.
Once we allow ourselves to be human and have moments when we’re not feeling great in our bodies, we must then acknowledge what is going on beneath the surface.
At the root of these joyless, sometimes heart wrenching moments is not that our bodies don’t measure up, but it’s our belief that we don’t measure up.
During these critical times, we’ve failed to acknowledge that our worth isn’t determined by external things. We’ve forgotten that our inherent worth was assigned to us the moment we were born. When we begin to embrace that no specific body type, jeans size, number on the scale, ability, achievement, material possession, decision or action makes us worthy, we can begin to see life through a new lens.
Like Ashley Graham, arriving at this place in my life didn’t happen overnight. I’ll admit that it’s been a long, and sometimes painful journey, but one that I’m so grateful to be still be traveling. Acknowledging that my “bad” body days were really about my lack of self-worth and not about my body has freed me.
Allowing this concept to take root in my soul has enabled me to stop trying to “fix” and/or change my body and instead open my heart and mind so that I could address the real issue. This is what has allowed me to start healing.
I’m happy to report that I have very few “bad” body days now. Instead, most of my days are spent respecting, appreciating, and dare I say loving my body regardless of what my weight is or what size jeans I‘m wearing.
My passion is to help women of all sizes and shapes, etc. respect and appreciate their bodies by acknowledging their inherent self-worth. If you’d like to know some of the things I do that help me bounce back when I’m having a “bad” body day, sign up to get my free helpsheet 5 Things to Help You Bounce Back from a “Bad” Body Day.
Click here to view the Ashley Graham video referenced in this article.