🎭🙈 Hiding Behind ‘My Face’ 🙈🎭
“I have always been judged by my looks. People see the cover, not the heart… I must say as I’ve got older I’ve developed a thick skin.”
“Your blog is about empowering women from the inside out. Why do we have to be ‘natural’ looking to relate to women?
Hello lovely ladies,
I’d like to start off by saying that this was not my intended post for this week but after a friend was kind enough to share my blog for me, he received a message from a friend of his who stated that she found it difficult to relate to me trying to inspire women to be better if I “hide behind my face.” This prompted me to address an issue I’ve dealt with for most of my adult life.
I decided that my first step would be to contact a few of my beautiful friends who also delighted in being fully ‘made up,’ doing their hair and dressing up everyday. The above are just two quotes I chose to use out of the many because I found them the most relevant to what I want to say. So you see; girls like me don’t like to talk about this because we feel isolated. Many years ago getting snide comments like ‘Barbie,’ “plastic’ and ‘false’ flung my way was hurtful to say the least. I was not mature or confident enough to accept it for what it was. I actually wondered what was wrong with me.
We are apparently a dying breed. Many of the men I have met have stated how enthralling it is to meet a woman who is so in touch with her feminine side. In fact I would say a vast percentage of men in the over 40 age group appreciate this in a woman. They find it sad that women just don’t seem to care and our casual lifestyles have not helped either.
A dear friend of mine remarked that he had seen me apply a fresh coat of lipstick before I got out of my car to meet him for lunch. I was really embarrassed that he had witnessed this and he jumped right in and told me the story of how the great Iron Lady, Margaret Thatcher, was seen doing the same thing before she attended a meeting with Ronald Reagan. How inspiring that such a powerful, dynamic woman was still in touch with her feminine side. She was by no means plastic, unintelligent or shallow. Yes, she was not a ‘Barbie’ but she still wanted to be the best she could be. And that is what my blog posts are about; inspiring women to be the best they can be depending on their personality types and needs in life. We are all different. Girls like me don’t judge girls who aren’t like us. We’re too busy enjoying our lives in our own way. We want the same for everyone else. We don’t judge you. Don’t judge us.
At night when I’m home I put my hair in a ponytail, remove my makeup and get ready for bed. I am the same as every other woman. I have had my heart broken on a thousand days in a thousand different ways. I’ve experienced overwhelming joy, indescribable pain, hurt, fear, loneliness and despair. I feel sadness for the cruelty in this world, devastation at the unfairness of society who judge others because they don’t fit into what they regard as the ‘norm.’ Heartbroken at watching leaders and people of influence with no scruples behaving as they do, being examples to our children in the worst possible way. You may think I’m plastic but I’m not. I have a heart and a soul. I’m kind, compassionate, spiritual and deep and no one will stop me from wanting to continue to inspire. If you think girls like me are plastic please think again — we are mothers, daughters, wives, partners, sisters and friends. And we are very real.
Regarding my involvement in the fashion industry: this world of glamor is and can be false and filled with fantasy. I don’t think there are many people who would disagree with the fact that a makeup-less, ungroomed celebrity would have a whole lot more difficulty selling a product than one who looks good. We like looking at pretty things. It’s human nature. And yes beauty is in the eye of the beholder but therein lies the crux of this discussion. Let’s not judge. Let’s be more accepting.
I must say that after hearing the comment of ‘hiding behind my face,’ I decided to take a photograph of myself looking my absolute worst. To show the world. After a three mile walk in sweltering heat sans hair and makeup being done. And then I thought about it. I would be pandering to everything I don’t believe in and am trying to reinforce in women. I would be unhappy in myself in order to make others happy. And so I decided to stay true to myself and stick with my beliefs.
Working closely with women for a very long time has shown me how rife insecurities run within us. And that’s is why I started this blog. I want every woman to find her best self. The person she is and wants to be. To love that person. Because then she will have true confidence. It’s not about the outer shell. It’s about the inner core. So lets stop judging each other and rather celebrate that each of us is unique. That each of us possess our own type of beauty. That’s what makes us all special. We were not created to fit into people’s molds but to create our own.
Now that I have got this off my chest I would like to say too that I have experienced a lot in my life that I have overcome. And I’m sure there will be more to come. It is this that makes me me. It is because of this too that I feel I am able to inspire women with the battles we face in life as women. I’m not sitting on a Barbie throne dishing out advice because I’ve lived my life with a silver spoon in my mouth. I have battled with many things and overcome them. I have helped inspire and heal many women I have come into contact with. What I say and offer comes from my life experience and seeing that simple things are often overlooked or forgotten. I know sometimes all we need is a friend to remind us and nudge us gently in the right direction.
Stay true to who you are. Love who you are. Because you are special. Unique.