Lessons From Me To You
Life is fickle. We cannot be certain of a definitive outcome we desire. Experiences teach us lessons more valuable we can learn from the four corners of an institution. Also, poor judgments are not failures for us to regret, but rather ricocheting us to bounce back strong and brave in the face of adversity. Financial loss, failed happily ever after relationship, and procrastination taught me that life is not just about temporary happiness and comfortability. Indeed, It is about experiencing these struggles with willpower that will help us stand for ourselves and also for others.
Financial loss is one of the hardest fights I have ever encountered in my entire life. Three years ago, I was a mere example of a YOLO type of person. I was content with my work back then. My earnings were enough to make ends meet, and eventually that kind of life became my comfort zone. I did not prepare myself to have any savings or emergency fund. I was stuck with “Live your life today”, “Buy anything that will make you happy today”, “Eat whatever you want”, and I’ll just worry for the next day because I believed that life is just too short might as well live life the best way I can while remunerating my Aunts in the Philippines who raised and took care of me as their own flesh. Until one day, I didn’t even notice that it is time to study and to work part-time. Indeed, It is true that time fly by so fast when you are having fun. Moreover, I can not live the way I live my life before coupled with school and a part time job. Hence, My financial needs became greater than what I was making. It came to a point that I could not afford to send money to the Philippines because I could not even afford to pay for my own daily needs. I struggled for days, weeks, months of trying to stretch out my pay cheque to cover everything. This moment gave me an epiphany that changes my perspective and help me achieve self-improvement and growth. After sacrificing school and work altogether, I did my best to not make the same mistake again. Today, my perspective of being a “YOLO” changed to “think twice before you spend” kind of mentality. I only spend on the things I needed and started investing to savings and emergency fund. In that way, I have enough savings to send to my Aunts in the Philippines and in case of emergency I have money in the bank to spend. Consequently, those mistakes shaped me into the person I am now, and I would not trade it any other way. This quarter life crisis and self-improvement will always be with me and I will definitely pass this on to my children. Certainly, experiences in life whether it is bad or good will change and lead us to the right path. Regrets are inevitable, but they are also a gift from above that will offer us new beginnings to make our life better than before.
Furthermore, life’s journey becomes meaningful and less stressful when you have someone who tirelessly supports, motivates, and encourages you to go on and move forward, but what if that person fails to do all your expectations? And just chooses to leave you in the middle of the long and winding road? It’s like the pain of waiting for snowfall in the wave of heat in summertime. It is a kind of pain that you do not even know where it is coming from. You can’t distinguish the type of pain whether it is throbbing, pulsating, shooting, or just merely the pain that rots you from the inside. I was like a candle melting myself to death. I felt like there was a waterfalls in my eyes because tears are flowing down from time to time, it never runs out. I felt like my heart was shattered into million pieces, but I still feel every beat of it. I would rather have a migraine every single day of my life than to experience this painful truth. Six years ago, I met this man that showed me what kindness was all about. He became my best friend and confidant. He became my family. Eventually. He proposed to me and the rest is history. It was a roller coaster ride kind of feeling. We get along really well. Our personality matches to one another we’re puzzle pieces complimenting each other, we fit just right. It was a perfect six years of my life, but in this world nothing is permanent even relationship. We had to part ways because of cultural differences. He can not marry anyone outside his community and he has to follow his cultures and his parents wishes. I don’t want to think of him as being a coward because I value the love and respect he has for his parents. He has done a great job of sacrificing his own bliss for the sake of his parents happiness. I could not do anything but to give up the love and connection we’ve shared.
“Let go a little and just let life happen”. — Kody Keplinger
It’s truly painful, but It made me realize that I have to let go of the things that I can not change. That I have to be selfless because loving someone also means to set them free and to make them happy even though you are no longer part of their world. This heartbreak woke me up to give myself time to feel the pain and to give myself the love I certainly deserve. I am moving on and going forward and during this moment of despair I’m beginning to know myself that I never knew before because I was focused only on one person and not on myself. Today, I am self-motivated to reach my career goals and to broaden my knowledge and perspective about life itself, and when this situation happens again, I will have the strength to endure the pain and the wisdom to understand and think through it. Also, at the end of the day we only have ourselves, So be kind to yourself. Pour all the love you can give to yourself, and always remember every time you see that beautiful soul in the mirror, tell her “I love you and I’m proud of you” because everyone is going to leave you but yourself.
Wasted time is the worst enemy that hinders you to rise up. Once it’s wasted we can not do anything to bring it back again. Procrastination lead me nowhere. I was easy-going, lazy, and homebody type of a person. All I wanted was to sleep during my off days and do nothing. I was extremely ashamed of my unproductive and irresponsible self before. In 2014, I have the luxury of time to study Nursing, but I throw it away. I was stuck in the comfortability of my job and my life back then. I always say to myself “Ah. I have so much time, and I’m still young. Studies can wait and it’s so easy to get into school.” This reality shattered my dreams into pieces when getting into Nursing school became harder as the years pass by. I asked myself a million times what if I focus on my studies before, I could have been working as a registered nurse today. Nevertheless, at one point in my life I realized that wasted time is not really a waste of time because those times that I neglect going to school I was trying to be a great provider for my family. That wasted time taught me to interact with other people and to embrace their cultures and differences. Also, most importantly it gave me the confidence to speak my heart out in English. Today, I learned to value the time that I have and to maximize it to the extent of my abilities; hence, I focus on my academic success, individuality and self-involvement to the community. I am now working my way to get into nursing program and at the same time trying my best to maintain my humanity by volunteering to community centers instead of just lounging my body at home and sleep. I am so thrilled of how I become a different person now. Truly, every failure in life will teach us something good to remember and it will surely lead us to our rightful destination.
Overall, life will not always grant us what kind of outcome we desire. Uncertainties in life is an inevitable part of success and we, humans are vulnerable to make these mistakes; however, there is always a brighter tomorrow that gives us another chance to make things right and to not make the same mistakes twice. Despite these financial, relationship, and wastefulness struggles, I find the determination to survive on my own and be my own hero. These life lessons from my shortcomings lead me to the road I’ve always wanted to travel. These challenges in life help me prepare for the upcoming chaos in my life. When I encounter a complicated road coupled with thunder and storm, I will now know how to survive amidst the ugliness of the surroundings and at the same time restoring my faith in humanity.
