quick positive thought

Didn’t sleep much last night, but I’m moving, continuing this day before Friday, as it rains outside. I could if I wanted just give up and tell myself repeatedly how tired I am and how my bills keep sucking the numerics from my checking account.. but no. I’m staying motivated — NO. More than motivated. I’m not stopping, for anything or anyone. Just as it rains outside, I precipitate with ideas, dreams, firm ambitions and specificity with where I want the day to do. So where I want it to go… some where positive. I’m positive now and I want the yay-saying vibes to build. My story today and all days is MY story.

The exhaustion is there, from not sleeping but I ignore it. I can’t afford to be slow if I’m to get what I want. Woke this morning saying to myself, “No.. not today.” What’s going to happen today is I will write, at least three pages — 3 salable pages. Take pictures of the soaked vineyard, write some more, brainstorm in Composition Book, and then just create whatever the hell I want. I’m going to be crazy with my creative today, just watch.

For a couple seconds, I don’t write… I just sip the coffee, listen to the rain, thank the moment for being the moment and being my moment. Today is all mine, and like I said to students yesterday, “End the semester in a way that impresses you.” Today I am stubborn in my sprint to impress myself, and I will rain harder than any front that passes through Sonoma County, or anywhere. This is not up for any kind of negotiate or revisit. I will create what I want today and today will have no option but to step to the side as I meet my self-demands.

(12/15/16)