Today, one of notes.
Not full sentences. Time to start the semester. Enthusiasm, fearless steps as I approach it. Learning from each morning and interaction, devoting — no, more than just some said or typed devotion, but faithfulness, to my studies. To my students who teach me more than any wine job could, ever. Stay in my current mode and story. But, with more.
Calm forces me to see where I am, what I’m doing. In being one creating, noting, recording my day, I break from anything slowing me, anything with any expectation of me away from the classroom, campus, the matriculants.
The Road, travel, mobility in one location, here, at this winery which I’ll soon leave behind for my words and offered thoughts.
Came to a reason, this morning, through new reasoning. Know what I will do, what I won’t. Where I will go, where I won’t. Work should always be passion-profuse, propelling, always. I can only let self write books, these compilations and towers of ideas and musings. Right now, hear Self tell me something. Won’t here it type, but I know, I know, I see more of me in this morning. May have happened before, but not like today.
I could have easily made a decision that would have severely damaged if not terminally injured my teaching life. But, meditation took a lead, a valuable step beyond this. I see beyond all of this. Wife just messaged me, saying she ran into a student of mine, student saying I was the best teacher she’d ever had. Now, I’m mad to learn more. I’m mad to teach, teach myself and maybe the students. Offer ideas, surely. Everything now, about the page, about knowledge, and my war for more knowledge. Thinking of my student who’s transferring to a UC I believe, from last semester, Jayden. Philosophy major. I see me in a Philosophy classroom, more than an English or Lit one, once in Palo Alto. Offering ideas on ideas themselves, thought, thinking and writing those thoughts for sakes of a later You.
Noting everything I entertain, today…. Nothing to do with where I am, but where I’m going. The first day of the semester. First day…. Thought. Knowledge. Where you are, where you’re going…. Can’t wait to be in the classroom. There is no confusion. None.
Notes, while in office:
-Singular words, ideas.
-The journal. Keep with the habit and practice.
-All thoughts are thoughts, YOUR thoughts, and are immeasurably valuable.
-Knowledge invites us, always.
I’ve said this before, but this will be the semester. The semester that ignites the rest of the semesters, the terms at Stanford and my travels to other campuses, sharing ideas.
At the winery today, and I have no problem saying I’m here, but not. I’m in my office, somewhere, be it Stanford or some little apartment or office I rent in Santa Rosa, Healdsburg, Windsor. Why haven’t I seen Life as I do this morning? Doesn’t matter. This day, this morning, I, constitute the singularity. There knowledge in this page, the walk down the stairs, the menial tasks in that tasting room.