Bernie Forms Love Voltron: Defender of the Universe
Listen up #BernieOrBust peeps.
So for weeks, there have been lots of theories about Bernie’s mad, mad, “chess playing” skills and how he has been plotting to win the nomination through some complex procedural ninjitsu. Or some “damn emails”. FDR endorsed his opponent, then won the nomination. Actually, no that didn’t happen.
So what was the endgame?
Bernie Sanders has been deep in the belly of the Democratic party machine getting concessions including:
- $15 minimum wage
- Overturning Citizen’s United
- Firing of Wasserman-Schultz
- Free College
- Expanded Medicare and Health Care
- Pathway to Marijuana legalization
- Revive Glass-Steagall
- Climate change accord
- Improvements to Social Security
In short, Bernie won us a list of concessions as long as my arm.
Bernie is one savvy-ass MF’er — and started in politics before you crawled out of your mom’s vajayjay. Bernie Sanders is not playing political “Ding-Dong Ditch it”. Bernie has spent every penny of his political capital on the brinksmanship needed to bring the entire Democratic Party to heel.
But there’s an old saying from Arkansas “it takes more than one lion robot to make a Voltron”. Analysts will tell you that the Clinton camp didn’t need to do jack shit. But he played this game into Hillary’s strengths — she is at heart a liberal, a pragmatic legislator and a negotiator. This is what Bernie saw in the belly of the whale and it’s why he has endorsed. Bernie truly must have felt that he was listened to, and that he got every inch of what we have earned in this process.
Despite the concessions, at the core, the entire decision by Bernie had to have come down to a single item — Bernie must have believed in the sincerity of Hillary Clinton in agreeing to the most progressive Democratic Party Platform in the history of the party. If Bernie believed Hillary was truly “crooked” believe me, you’d be seeing hella revolution right now in the fucking streets of Philly.
So why did he endorse?
Because Bernie Sanders looked unblinkingly into the eyes of his opponent and saw something redeeming.
At this stage in the game, we do need a Defender of the Universe that is bigger than any single robot lion — I mean we are up against King Zarkon of the Planet Doom, ok? Think about what Bernie has done.
Bernie has spent the last few weeks of the campaign of his life working closely with the Clinton camp to show all of us what it was about the entire time. It has always been about all of us, especially the most vulnerable.
So right now there are a lot of theories suggesting that Hillary Clinton is basically Crazy-Assed Galadriel after smoking from the One Ring Crack Pipe.
Think it through. Would Bernie spend all of his time and political capital throwing his hat into the ring with Mordor? Who do you think he is, Saruman?
No my friends, Bernie is Gandalf Greyhame, striking the ensorcelled leader in the noggin with his staff.
So now we have a Bernie-Hillary Love Voltron. Because Citizen’s United should be overturned, not Roe v Wade. Because in order for the political revolution to work, we need a Democratic president, a Democratic congress, and the most progressive Democratic party platform in the history of the party.
Bernie’s actions speak louder than words. Love Trumps Hate. The political revolution is alive and well.
Voltron: Part man, part woman, part Bernie, party Hillary, part machine, part giant robot with the heart of a Lion. The vulnerable in our society now have a Legendary Defender.