New here? I have always been here, with myself.

These sharing and expression of words formulated in my tumultuous mind of rapids, of thought, tension, & void.
This internalized voice of mine that I have reserved and restricted because of what was instilled in me from neglect and indifference.
That my external worth was only as good as how funny my last name sounded, or how my sensitive soul shone like a beacon in a sea of white hate.

Beyond this external vessel of skin and blue eyes, of conditioned oppression, of euro/indigenous blood. Always seeking an answer to “who am I?” “What am I?” “ What is real?”. Internalized confusion, hate, and I have been asking the wrong questions, inevitably forgiveness and acceptance is the answer.

Forgiveness for all the hurt and harm caused within, to try and fit a mold not intended for me. Acceptance that I am beyond that, those thoughts actions, and shell of harm. That I am love, set to age in a cool dim cavern of isolation, Even the warmth of connection with external is distant when present.

Here I am, here I’ve always been. Beyond body and space, in the trees and the water, The soil and the dust.