Absolutely agree with all of this.
Ryan Mitchell

Is it really so wrong to discriminate based on personality and “team fit” though?

I don’t drink either, had a hard time with alcoholism that blessedly ended many years ago. No drugs etc either and I’ve experienced the same thing: working in a team of awesome people that I just couldn’t hang out with because they indulged regularly. I don’t have a problem around that stuff but they felt weird about my abstinence and were made doubly uncomfortable by the fact of me being vegan, which I don’t talk about like the stereotype but which comes up every time food is ordered. Socially there can be a parallel friction: you’re not on the same “diet” as them and that can be a not-insignificant distraction.

So can you really begrudge people for wanting teamwork to be pleasant? With that team, despite our professional compatibility and skill, I just wasn’t able to mesh with them easily, and eventually left of my own will (fair point would be that at least I got hired first and was able to deal with it for 2 years…) to pursue a group that found me less obnoxious.

Incidentally I was in a very ethnically diverse crowd that was 70% female. I was also the only white dude but despite the social-media climate it was very definitely real, neutral-but-noticeable personal differences and not race or gender discrimination that made me uncomfortable.

(I did get sexually harassed and touched inappropriately a few times but it’s a lot different when they can’t actually rape you easily so I think that has no bearing here)

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