Your 9-to-5 is slowly killing you
The hazards of cubicle work, and what you can do to make it better
This post was originally published in October 2014, and I’ve recently dusted it off from the archives and provided updated commentary for this new world we live in, nearly a decade later. Please take a read on my Substack.
Do you give yourself a pep talk à la Coach Taylor before getting out of bed every morning?
Is coffee your best friend?
Do you have an involuntary reaction to the sound of new email?
Do you use bathroom time as meditation time?
Have you seriously considered taking two lunches?
Have you taken two lunches?
These may be signs that your 9-to-5 job is slowly killing you.
Don’t get me wrong. We need 9-to-5 jobs — they keep the world functioning. They pay the rent. The corporate culture is not going to change any time soon.
It’s how you approach it that will save you.
I’ll get to that later. Let’s start with how your office job is kicking your ass.
PHYSICAL HEALTH. Washington Post did this great infographic earlier this year on the health hazards of sitting. Sitting too much, in your sad cubicle, for example, causes issues — not limited to — organ damage, improper spine alignment and muscle degeneration.
On top of that, most 9-to-5 office jobs nowadays require extensive computer usage. That means eye strain, headaches and migraines. Not fun.
You’ll also get fat. I know you have snacks tucked away in those drawers (why aren’t you sharing?). Paired with exhaustion, people are more likely to plop in front of the television when they get home, and that can cause even more weight gain and premature death, from an increased risk of diabetes and heart disease.
It’s a slippery slope, folks.
Are you sick for the tenth time this year? You can probably blame your job.
From carbon monoxide to bacteria, your office is a prison for contaminants. The EPA has dubbed it “Sick Building Syndrome.” Not being able to open windows means breathing in old air for more than eight hours a day, five days a week. Doctors associate the doubling of asthma rates since 1980 to bad indoor air quality.
In addition, open offices — designed to foster “cooperation” and “creativity” — are significantly more likely to spread illnesses. Maybe reschedule that meeting with your sniffling coworker.
MENTAL & EMOTIONAL HEALTH. Stress. Boredom. Depression. All killers.
Deadlines, achievement expectations and workplace relationships all contribute to stress that can easily overwhelm you. It can creep into other aspects of your life, including personal relationships and goals.
Feel emotionally exhausted and cynical about everything? You are definitely not alone.
Stress can lead to burnout. Burnout can then, in turn, bring about depression, which is linked to an assortment of health concerns.
Gallup’s well-being survey found that 11% of full-time American workers have been diagnosed with depression at some point in their lives. While that’s not limited to just 9-to-5 office workers, more than 13 million is a lot of people.
In another study, researchers interviewed more than 7,000 civil servants over 25 years and found that those who reported “a great deal of boredom” were 37% more likely to have died at the end of the study. Scientists say maybe these people shared certain characteristics, or maybe they turned to self-destructive behavior out of boredom.
You can literally be bored to death. Yay.
FIGHT THE 9-TO-5 DEATH. That itch. The feeling you get when the office and your work get stale. The desire for change and purpose becomes overwhelming.
How do you make it better?
Start by being aware. Be aware of what’s making you unhappy at your job and how you’re reacting. Make a list. Then make a list of things you can proactively do to improve those problems.
Is it talking to coworkers you have issues with? Your boss? Taking on more responsibility? Less? You only have yourself to blame if you don’t actively try.
It’s easy to get immersed in work, but try to take frequent breaks from your desk. Drink plenty of water so your bladder will give you an excuse to get up. Take a stroll outside if you can (we’re probably all Vitamin D deficient). Try to eat lunch away from your germ-infested cubicle—your body and mind will thank you.
Take outside interests. Set goals for yourself. Is it working on your personal fitness? Writing a post on Medium? Collaborating with friends on a creative venture? Reading more books? Do something separate from your job that makes you happy.
Most importantly, compartmentalize. Keep your professional life and your personal life as separate as possible. Train your brain to leave work at the office.
Ultimately, it’s just a job.
We put so much emphasis on our work to rule who we are. But your self-worth isn’t — or I should say, shouldn’t be — determined by your fancy title or your salary. So stop beating yourself up about it.
If all else fails, though, quit.
Find another job or profession or passion. Be happy.
(Just don’t quit like this or this — in case you change your mind.)
