There’s this buzz. This bug. This nasty gnat nagging in my ear as rapid harsh whispers strike me every waking second of my being. Words I can’t decipher, but dark competing clouds I can picture. Overwhelming, overlapping, overrunning, running over each other until they reach me.
Shapeless it takes shape to grasp and to grab me. Fingers so slender, palms so opened and yet so heavily pressed against my chest. Keeping me down, splayed on the ground. My lungs popped and punctured as violent hands who had once lured me like an inviting blanket, to swaddle me, now squeezes and suffocates me.
My mind is full. My eyes dim. Everything is blurry and heavy. I can’t shut it up. I can’t stop it. A chokehold takes hold. And I stop. I don’t struggle. It’s hopeless. I’m hopeless. It’s useless. I’m useless. At least there’s no pain. Just numb dumb dullness.
But a dark shadow, an evil sentiment is felt with every inch of what is left of me and my mind and my body. My useless body. Just a body, anybody, no body, nobody.